How are you today, Renee? Feeling any better? I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm so lucky that my H understands, that makes all the difference in the world! I wish I could help you through this, I'm not sure what to do. NSR is right, you do need to start some counseling. Maybe your H will come around then. My H doesn't particularly like to discuss it, either, but I got him to open up about it last night. He did more listening than talking, but he did ask a few questions. His support is what helped me the most. I wish you that support and hope somehow you can get it.<P>You didn't call OM did you? PLEASE don't. It really does make it worse. Keep praying and praying so that you don't. Last week I had that urge and I prayed and others here prayed for me, and it got me through. (Until he called me the next day! yuck) If prayer isn't working, keep praying and call out for others to pray for you. I know the pain and "wanting" you're going through.<P>Please hang in there, you will get through this. We can all do it together! My thoughts and prayers are with you, Renee!