My friends<P>Today I am in one of thos frames of mind where I wonder where this is all leading.<P>Rutger, I feel your situation is the one that most resembles mine.<P>My W left 3 months ago to live in her own apartment to "see how she felt", "she loved me but wasn't In Love with me" I was unaware at the time of the OM who she had been seeeing 6 months prior(stupid me).<P>Since then I have been semi Plan Aing as we have seen each other 2 - 3 times a week (whenever she has nothing planned with the OM).<P>The point is that over the past 3 months we have been communicating reasonably well with a minimum of LBs (I have been proud of the way I have restrained myself as she has been fairly provocative at times).<P>This, however, is having the effect of me losing respect and love for her at an alarming rate (my love bank deposits are at an all time low).<P>The timing is ripe for a full Plan B which I undertake next week when I leave the state completely. My W is aware I am leaving but not that I will break all contact at the same time. I plan to write a comprehensive letter making sure she knows my reasons for breaking contact and to ensure her that I am an attractive alternative to the OM. I am as prepared for the event as I ever will be.<P>I don't think it will worry her too much as contact with me at the moment is all one way (me calling her) but of course this is the main thing that will change, apart from some financial support issues (she basically just spends what she neeeds to at the moment with open access to our accounts).<P>I would appreciate any comments from all you good folk out there as to your opinion in what I plan.<P>Rutger, I believe from your story and your W's ambivalence that Plan B may be an option for you at this stage, just a thought, let me know what you think. <P>Regards<BR>Fairenough

Fairenough,<BR>I know how you feel. The waffling is the hardest part. Sounds like you have had about all you can take. I, like you, am proud of who I am becoming. I am a different person than I was last year. I am now who she always wanted yet she refuses to see that. I don't know if its out of denial or if she still is in her Fantasy world that she is blinded. I guess it doesn't matter. If you are ready for plan B then do it and stick to it. <P>It will be hard for you and I both but this is what needs to be done to retain our own sanity. I guess I will be taking my own advice at this point. Which is, Be strong and don't waver. Go to Plan B if you are to a point where it is just to painful......I am.<P>Thanks for thinking of me, I'm right here with you.......<P>------------------<BR>Rutger......One day at a time.<P><BR>

A question...would plan B also entail having seperate accounts to preclude the need for conversation concerning joint accounts? Also, would that possibly have the reaction of making her realize that things would change without you? HMMMMM........

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