One thing I don't want to become is paranoid. Yesterday my husband advised me that he wasn't going into work because he was going to a golf outing with the owner of the company he works for and some others. He left this morning at 8:00am (the golf outing is about 45 minutes away) and didn't return until after 8:00pm. He missed our oldest son't first baseball game of the season. No phone call home or to my cell phone all day.<P>Now I realize that golfing can take sometime but alllllll dayyy! I am not talking to him right now because I know I will love bust!<P>How do I say what the hell happened without screaming?? I usually don't get a response from you guys until the next morning since I don't get an opportunity to come to this site until late in the evening.<P>OK maybe I had to get that out..I'm going to tell him that I am very dissapointed that he missed the game and so is our son...I hope to get some kind of decent response or believe me I'll be telling you guys how I screamed all evening.<BR>I understand the plan A and how I am supposed to meet his needs and not love bust, but sometimes this stuff makes you feel like you're just getting walked on.

d y o thsee h w I writ thith...<P>That's what happens when you bite your toungue.<P>I hurts like hell...<BR>...but Plan A asks you to do just this.<P>Letting him know... "I feel upset because our son had his first baseball game without his dad"... should be enough.<P>Then turn away...<BR>...your urge to LB will be great!... don't!<P>There will be days he'll make up for it (I hope)...<BR>...making it into an Everest isn't in anyone's interest.<P>If what you say helps him to apologize to your son... leave it at that!<P>Prayers for your strength... <P>Jim

Thanks a lot Jim ( I had to laugh at the biting my tongue part of your reply ha ha). I did exactly that and got no response. Now he's lying on the couch asleep. He never did say anything to our son who is asleep also. Can't help but wonder why he's so tired???? I am not going to say anything more though. Plan A is tough, I've got to stick with it though. thanks again.

Dear C33,<BR>Oh, I empathize with you...I am feeling the same way - this plan A is hard!! And, I know my H had a night with OW on a supposed company golf outing...so, I can totally relate - but at that time, I had no idea about the A, but he spent the night - it was 2 hrs away - didn't call til 12:30 that night; said he got caught in traffic. Ha!How naive I was!! We are in this together - let's continue supporting and praying for one another!! Sincerely, Annc

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by confused33:<BR><B>One thing I don't want to become is paranoid. Yesterday my husband advised me that he wasn't going into work because he was going to a golf outing with the owner of the company he works for and some others. He left this morning at 8:00am (the golf outing is about 45 minutes away) and didn't return until after 8:00pm. </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Maybe he was with the OW.<P>But I'm a golfer that plays in a lot of corporate outings, and I can tell you that time frame is perfectly reasonable. He was gone for 12 hours. 90 minutes of travel, morning rush hour, say that leaves 10 hours. A round of golf in a corporate outing can easily take 5-6 hours. Many outings run something like this:<P>check in at 9:30 - 10:00 am for buffet breakfast. Practice or seminar with pro. Early lunch 11:00-12:00. Shotgun start at 11:30 5 hour + round, 5:00 return for shower and cocktail hour. 6:30 dinner and award banquet. <P>Many of the nice courses demand three meals in their package, so in turns into an all day thing.<P>Now....if he came home from the tournament with nothing...no bag tag, no good y bag, no little gift...that would be a little suspicious. Go look on his golf bag and see if there is a little plastic tag with the course name. <P>Call the course and ask them how long the outing ran. Say you are a secretary and you are accounting for a salesperson's time.<P>But I don't think this is an implausible story. Now, whether he should have figured out that he would miss your son's game is a different story. But....I have been at outings that dragged much longer than I thought...and if you are with the boss.. <BR> <BR>