I read a couple of articles in the paper in the last few weeks about surveys in the local high schools that reported that well over 20% of the kids had considered suicide during the last year. On this bulletin board, in the last few days I have read of two cases where teenagers expressed suicidal thoughts. One of my kids said that within ten years she expected that at least one of her siblings would have committed suicide, which was really scary. The day after my H left, I read an article mentioning that a college age girl had committed suicide over her parents' divorce. The brother of an acquaintance of my daughter's hanged himself not long after moving in with his mother and her new husband.<P>Everything I have read has said that you are supposed to take suicide threats seriously. Is anyone else as worried about these threats as I am?<BR>

Actually, Nellie my step daughter who is 19 is someone who we are concerned about. She lives in CA, and is a diabetic. She recently had an abortion from an incestuous relationship with her mother's brother-in-law... It was a horrible mess, and she feels very guilty.<P>She's been in the hospital about every 10 days from diabetic reactions - and doctor held her 72 hours about 5 weeks ago - concerned about suicide. <P>Her mother and father divorced over 10 years ago - but she hasn't recovered.<P>Maybe send hubby a copy of this article? He needs to start taking notice of his children.

I believe that we should ALWAYS take suicide threats to heart. <P>So far, during this horrible process of being betrayed and betrayer, my teenage children have not gone to those lengths. But one of them (the 18 yr. old) ended up in the ER last week for "stress related illeness" and my 14 yr. old son is being put back on medication because he feels "out of control". I listen to them, listen to the dr.s, and trust my intuition. <P>This is a tough business for kids... horrible! The things we do in the name of love...

hi nellie, teen suicide is such a huge issue and getting worse all the time. I would always take any talk very seriously. Very scary situations, even when divorce and infidelity are not involved! <BR>My heart always goes out to the teens-they have a very hard time. Lots of issues that we did not have to face in quite the same way. Hopefully we will remember to be good listeners whenever our teens or their friends have troubles. (maybe that is why I always have so many kids at my house!?)

I have been thinking about this subject lately myself ... I don't have kids, but I do have nieces and nephews, and I would be worried about them.<P>One of the things I suddenly thought about with regard to this issue is the romanticism that surrounds suicide in classical literature. Think about it: we are teaching hormonally erratic teens about Romeo and Juliet - star-crossed lovers who killed themselves for love. And this is FAR from the only one!<P>Put it all together and you've got a formula for tragedy: hormones, self-esteem issues, the myriad emotional troubles of divorce topped off with a strong message that suicide is romantic in some way ... <P>I remember how influential certain high school classes and/or instructors were on my thoughts and feelings... They mean no harm but are so enthused about the messages of classical literature or creative writing or ... well... It's positively frightening.<P>I'll get down off my soapbox here ... Next?<P>terri

Back in December my then 17 year old h.s. senior went off the deep end. This was the worst time of our marriage. He told me he thought about going down in the garage, putting a cd on and just ending it in his car. The next day he lost it after wrestling practice and went off on a kid over nothing.<P>I got him in therapy. He dropped out of wrestling for about three weeks. The therapist said the dropping weight routine added fuel to the the fire he was going through. The therapy turned him around. He was also not allowed to drop weight. He won the county championship not dropping weight, wrestling at his natural weight, but unfortunately he wasn't able to go to state. He was projected as a state champion prior to the season in several classes lower, so he felt like he had let his coach down (more self-inflicted pressure). <P>I feel like if there hadn't been some intervention we would have faced even more tragedy in our home. His story has a happy ending. He realized nothing was his fault and he had to let go of feeling like it was. He graduated with honors and is now very happy at school. He isn't the same kid he was last year at this time. TO ANY OF YOU WITH KIDS -- PAY ATTENTION TO THOSE CRIES FOR HELP. HIS STARTED WITH LITTLE THINGS -- GETTING CAUGHT DRINKING, LYING ABOUT WHEREABOUTS, ETC ETC ETC. My H still thinks the whole thing was a crock. But there again, that's who he is.

hi janie, Your son is off in college, right? He is a lucky kid to have you there for him, to have someone strong and reliable when he needed you. You intervened when some would have sloughed it off. You are a great mom and role model for him!! (((hugs)))<BR>We need to be so careful with our kids! THey are much more sensitive than we think sometimes, and some have yet to learn how to communicate this to us. <BR>My oldest is doing just great now too! He is back in college, working at a publishing co, and very happy. Still drinks occ, but not to drunkeness. The youngest is okay too and working on relationship with dad.<BR>Hugs to all those teens that have pulled out of the pit, and a hand to all those that need it.