My husband is in the military and travels alot. About 10 years ago he had a terrible experience of sleeping with a women, just once. This time he had an affair of 2 months long that he was looking for. Our marriage wasn't a marriage for the last 10 years because I could never bring myself to trust him while he was gone. Now I can't believe he did this to me again. I'm so full of hate, betrail, resentment and a ton more of emothions. I can't get the thought of him in bed with her. I battered him with questions and he answered them, so I know everything about the affair. He gave me a gift of a STD which just made matters worse. I felt so dirty. He understands what he did was wrong and the affair is over. We both want to start over, but I have all the feelings overpowering me and I can't see past the affair. I'm reading Surviving An Affair, but there is no relief in sight. HELP!!!!!!!!<P>------------------<BR>2nd chance

I'm so sorry for your pain...it is awful, I know.<P>If you & your H want to work together on the marriage, this is a great place to start. Srviving an Affair is good...<P>Posting and reading here will be helpful too. You can get over this. If you work together, you can have a much better marriage than you had before...<P>Hang in there--<P>Kathi

The anger and hurt is so normal - do not repress that or it will build up inside you. This is the place to vent,with a trusted friend, or with a professional. Once you can share your hurt without all the anger with your H - then yes, he needs to understand just how this has affected you. He must understand the pain. After the Affair, by Janis Springs is excellent too!<BR>God Bless - you have my prayers !

Welcome <B>2nd chance</B>...<P>I have a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... <P>It has a lot of quick links to many of the <B>most</B> important MB sites...<BR>Click here ==> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000002.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)</A><P><B>About your post</B>...<P>The first few weeks, and sometimes months are very hard...<P>You might consider some counseling...<BR>I would recommend that you have a couple of <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7200_phone.html" TARGET=_blank>telephone counseling sessions</A> (~$95US a pop... but well worth it) with <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7010_about.html" TARGET=_blank>Steven W. Harley</A> or Jennifer Harley. Check out the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7000_counsel.html" TARGET=_blank>Counseling Center</A>... and for some specifics... <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7015_fee.html" TARGET=_blank>Fees for Counseling Services</A> and <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7020_sched.html" TARGET=_blank>Scheduling an Appointment</A> (888-639-1639)!<P>Over and above that... your emotional state can cause numerous chemical imbalances...<BR>...sometimes (not always) based on your doctor's advice, some prescription anti-depressants can help.<P>But.. nothing... is better than the help (day in... day out...) that you can get in a support group <B>like the people here</B>!<P> <P>Jim