my husband of 2 years has recently started to chat with other women over a chat program when he's at work...he told me about it and after i mentioend to him that it makes me feel uncomftable he told me that they contacted him not the other way around.<BR>in my opinion that dones't make a big difference. he told two of them to contact me (we use the same chat program he at work i at home). he doens't tell me a whole lot about their conversations and i don't know if i should ask him about it. <BR>our relationship suffred some real deep trust issues after he lied to me about a porn issue a while ago...i don't think i really recovered from that yet and i feel we're drivting further apart... <BR>please help!<BR>

Consider printing off some of the contents of the following sites....<P><A HREF="http://www.wildxangel.com/" TARGET=_blank>What They're Not Telling You - Or How to Read Between the Lies!!</A><BR><A HREF="http://www.chatcheaters.com" TARGET=_blank>Internet Infidelity Prevention, Detection, Advice and Books</A><BR><A HREF="http://netaddiction.com/" TARGET=_blank>Center for On-Line Addiction</A><P>And for some posts on these forums...<BR>...to be avoided (i.e. reasons for having to go through withdrawal)<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum1/HTML/006384.html" TARGET=_blank>Calling all betrayers: stories of withdrawal-how long? How bad?</A>…..Sad4Now…..8/17/1999<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum28/HTML/001692.html" TARGET=_blank>For Schizzo: a reply to your question</A>(When WS Confesses)…..BrokenButNotCrushed…..3/18/2000<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum28/HTML/002858.html" TARGET=_blank>Withdrawl Support...."THE LIST"</A>…..NoMas…..5/11/2000<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum37/HTML/007270.html" TARGET=_blank>A testimonial about "no contact"</A>…..rockaway…..1/20/2001<P> <P>Jim

thanks jim, i had a good look at your links.<BR>i really ahve a lot of trouble communicating with my husband. any concerns coming from me are just beeing ignored or laughed at , but mostly he get's angry. <BR>i harlty every talks about his feelings. we had a real trust break between us a year ago, and we got a a lot fo trust built, but not enough yet i guess. but he dosn't really seem to care to help me trust him again. <BR>he says i should know but i don't.<BR>does anyone of an idea on this?<P>

{Sammy},<P>It is almost impossible for someone to be force into counseling.<P>That being said...<BR>...if you start counseling <B>on your own</B>...<BR>...your counselor might be able to drawn him in... after a while...<BR>...but there are no guarantees.<P>I would recommend that you have a couple of <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7200_phone.html" TARGET=_blank>telephone counseling sessions</A> (~$95US a pop... but well worth it) with <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7010_about.html" TARGET=_blank>Steven W. Harley</A> or Jennifer Harley. Check out the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7000_counsel.html" TARGET=_blank>Counseling Center</A>... and for some specifics... <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7015_fee.html" TARGET=_blank>Fees for Counseling Services</A> and <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7020_sched.html" TARGET=_blank>Scheduling an Appointment</A> (888-639-1639)!<P>Some of the alternatives to direct counseling are also good...<BR>...are those that were recommended by <B>Sisyphus</B> in <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum8/HTML/003393.html" TARGET=_blank>Someone help me...</A>.<P>I'd also throw in <A HREF="http://www.wwme.org/new.html" TARGET=_blank>World Wide Marriage Encounter</A> as well.<P> <P>Jim