My husband has a son with his ex-gf they never got married, he lied about it, I only found it out.I tried to end the relationship that time but he wouldn't let me go instead he proved his loved and sincere intention to me. I migrated to Canada in '96 and he came to Canada as a tourist and offer me marriage to prove his love for me. We got married in Feb/97. While he's in our native country he got a work to NY and stayed with his aunt - not as immigrant but working visa only. So I decided to sponsor him, while I'm processing my sponsorship to join me here, I would go there every 2 weeks or he'll visit me here in Canada. When I go there we normally stayed in a hotel and he'll stay with me when he visits me. I never called him at home, I always call him at work. In Sept/00 I got pregnant with our first child. Our plan is I'll stay with him in NY during my maternity leave and both of us migrate to Canada after a year. This time I insisted of getting his home number for an emergency. He wouldn't give it to me with so many excuses. To make the story short I found the phone number and his aunt told me he's not living there anymore for more than 3 months. I confronted him but he still keeps on insisting that he still lives in the same address. I let him talked to his aunt and at that point he couldn't lie anymore. I found out that he has his own apartment and the ex-gf and their son lives with him since Nov/00. He said they'll be staying there for few months and they are gone before I move in that was his plan. He also said he misses his son very much and that's the only way to become closer to him even for a while. I wanted to confront the woman but my husband pleaded not to make any scene because of his son, he loves him very much.So, I didn't do it for the sake of his son (7 yrs old). He also said that me and his son is the only one he loves. It was very painful, I love my husband very much too and now we're gonna have our baby soon and I want to protect her. Besides I am the wife and I will fight for my right and for my love. I grew up without a father, he died when I was young. I know how hard to live without a father by your side and I don't want my child to experience that. I love my husband very much and I want to save our marriage. He's the only man I ever loved. I waited for so long before I went into a relationship and when I found him I felt so loved and I was treated like a queen. He even proved to me that he love me when he followed me here in Canada and offered me marriage. After I found the truth, I came back here to Canada with so much pain, I couldn't sleep, I don't have appetite to eat. The only strength that I have right now is my unborn baby and prayers. My husband was very sorry for what had happened. Right now I feel that he was so confused. I don't feel divorce will be the answer. I love him and I want to save our marriage. I'm giving him sometime to fix everything before I give birth so we can live together. Is this the right thing to do?<P>Pls help

nzc270,<P>I'm sorry you're in the situation you're in.<P>It is a very hard situation.<P>I would, first and foremost, find out if he has some "marital" relationship with the (girlfriend)... maybe a "common-law marriage"?<P>This will have a very serious impact on any decision you make.<P>Stay here... and ask for advice...<P>You may want to post on the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/forumdisplay.cgi?action=topics&number=37&DaysPrune=10&LastLogin=" TARGET=_blank>General Questions II</A> forum...<BR>...for a more varied response.<P> <P>Jim