You know, I have just recently regained my faith after my affair devastated my family and my life (and the life of the OM. It has come to my attention since I've been in counseling with the pastor's wife and reading and studying the Word regarding this issue, that above all things our Father wants the best for His children. He loves us infinately. <P>This is particularly difficult to remember when things seem so hopeless! The point I want to make is this: REGARDLESS of what your husband does and the pain it causes you and your family; REGARDLESS of whether you rebuild your marriage or not; REGARDLESS of his status with the Lord, YOUR LOVING FATHER has a perfect Plan and has already put it in motion. Remember-all things work together for GOOD for those that love Him. Even the most difficult and painful times!<P>After the pain my H and I went through, I am still hurting tremendously by the way, I have finally begun to reclaim the power available to me through Christ and am CLAWING my way back to fullness of spirit!<P>My overwhelming advice would be: NO matter WHAT-trust in the Lord. He knows your needs, and He won't let you down. Trust His plan even when all seems hopeless. Pray without ceasing and be the best example to your H you can be of a faithful Christian woman. Scripture talks of winning your H over by attitude alone!<P>Remember to PRAY and really make your only focus to glorify God and to love Him and you will be alright. In fact, you'll be blessed!<P>In His Love, <P>Tracy<P>------------------<BR>"I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me."

Thank you for your post. <BR> I have tried through the church I have been going to, to get some counceling but they provide none. ANd I am in such a small town that it is over 100 mls away to anything. So it is so hard with no one to talk to . That is why this site has become my second home.<BR> <BR> I keep coming to the same thing, and cannot really get an answer from anyone maybe you can help. <BR> I know it says in the bible the if there is infidelity that it is just cause for divorce.Ow actually felt the need to inform me of this, though I already had read it.<BR>I also understand that God hates divorce and it hurts him in any instnace. <BR> What I am getting at is, how do you really know if fighting is the right thing to do. Being treated so badly makes finding a reason to fight for this marriage so foggy. I just wonder if maybe all this is God's way of trying to get me out of here? I am just so confused about this. I mean how much are we supposed to keep up the good fight????<P>------------------<BR>God is our refuge and STRENGTH,<BR>A very Present help in trouble.<BR>Psalm 46:1<BR>I sought the Lord and he heard me, <BR>and delivered me from all my fears.<BR>Psalms 34:4<P>

Ugh...that's a hard one, and my answer isn't any easier.<P>Infidelity is a reason for divorce, yes, but only as a last resort. Scripture says that if the unbeliever leaves, to let him do so. But you are to remain in the marriage and seek the Word for instruction. Try reading the book of Matthew when Jesus teaches on marriage and divorce.<P>Yes, God HATES divorce. I believe that even in the cases where people are terribly mismatched, God can heal their marriages and make them truly one heart. He is fully capable of restoring your marriage! THe tough part is to live only for the purpose of glorifying Him. That means to try to set your pain aside and truly seek Him. There is a reason you're going through this. I can't tell you what that is, but God knows, for it's part of His plan. Just don't ever forget that "All things work together for GOOD to those that LOVE the Lord!".<P>Also try to remember that Jesus loves your husband too-and wants him to be saved as much as he wants you to be saved. <P>I would try to search the internet for net counseling (it *is* available in some instances) from a church of some kind. Be very cautious, however, and pray constantly about your progress and every decision you make. It's so important at this stage! I am on almost daily but had not been here for a while, as my affair ended a good 6 mos ago and I have been continuing to heal.<P>Best of luck to you<P>Tracy<P>------------------<BR>"I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me."

THANK YOU!!!! <P>I feel a bit of hope, your words were very encouraging I will go read MATT. THANKS again