Im new here so please bear with me. I just found out two weeks ago that my H is having an A. I was truly hurt by this which Im sure you all know about that. I never got angry with H over it. I just asked how we can fix our marriage. H wouldnt talk. He just said he aint ready to give her up. So i faithfully stood by while i watched him leave to go out with OW. He is still with OW and calls the OW from our house while im here. only once did i fly off the handle, that was when the OW called my house to talk to him while i was home. I told him it was very disrespectful to be having OW calling our house. after that H said he wants a divorce now. H goes out with OW all hours of the night. Calls OW from our house anytime he pleases. I have tried to meet his emotional needs and other needs during this time but he doesnt want me to. He ignores all tries. He is pretty much only civil to me because the kids are here. H says he is in love with OW and no longer loves me. H says i have pushed him too far away. i still love him but dont know what to do to show it since he ignores all tries. as long as he keeps seeing the OW im afraid i will never be able to get him back. they have been together for eight months he says. We have been together for 9 years married 7. we have two children a 10 month girl and a five year old boy. any suggestions would be greatly appreciated on how to bring my husband back.

{{{Tina27}}}<p>I am so sorry, I hear the pain you are going thru and my heart goes out to you. Have you been reading Plan A/B? There are also books, His Needs, Her Needs, Surviving an Affair, Torn Assunder, that I would recommend for you to read. <p>One thing does concern me, this is the blantant openness of his contact with OW. You are correct that it is disrespectful. I could add a few other things, but feel that is not my place.<p>Have you talked to him about boundries? Telling him exactly what you will or will not accept. Are you in counselling? Is your H willing to go to counselling with you?<p>I highly suggest counselling for yourself. Part of healing your M, is healing yourself and making changes in yourself. The only person you can control and change is you. <p>Please know that you are not alone, I will even pray for you.<p>God Bless, CD