It has been three weeks since I caught W in an A. We have both read Surviving An Affair and appear to be attempting to recover. <p>My dilema is the OM works at the hospital. She says absolutely no contact has been made and he has gone out of his way to avoid seeing or contacting her. Is changing jobs an absolute requirement? <p>
PS. The day after I found out I called the OM and told him "to stay the f___ away from my wife"<p>coping&hoping

I don't think it's a bad idea to change jobs, at least that way the temptation will not always be there. My H had an affair, we are still trying to get past it and he no longer works at the company were the OW does. I couldn't handle it if he saw her everyday. Just my thoughts.
Andrea

I have to agree with Andrea, I don't think working in the same place is a good idea. I would ask her to start looking around...hospitals all over are in desperate need of all kinds of staff.<p>If she is willing to do that, that speaks volumes about her commitment to your M.

I also agree about switching jobs. Contact has to stop completely, not even casual contact, in order for the BS to really begin the recovery process. It also comes down to basic respect for BS's feelings and a step to re-establish the trust that was destroyed by WS's A. If the WS could switch places with BS they could see how important that this is. <p>In my case the OM is a neighbor and our kids still play together so I am reminded everyday of what happened. There is no way that I am uprooting the kids again (also couldn't afford another decent house right now) so I have to just learn to live with it and hope WS can make that extra effort to staying away from OM and commiting to the M.

Coping&Hoping, my H had an emotional affair w/ a coworker 2 1/2 years ago. He is still working with her and still denies it was as serious as I think. We are still married and I am still coping with him working w/ her...he has contact w/ her every day. I would suggest if it is possible for your W to change jobs. It makes the healing/recovery process FOR YOU much easier w/ no contact. But I guess the only question I have is...does it matter if she quits and moves on to a new job? If she and the other man are going to be together...they will find a way to make this happen. And if she does change jobs who is saying she won't find a new other man. Basically, what I am saying is the both of you need to want this marriage to work and find a way to make a new fresh start with a healthy marriage, relationship and friendship. Best of luck. All of the people on this site have given some wonderful advice to me, and just reading posts here have helped me alot. Take care