My H and I have been together for almost 9 yrs. Not including the latest OW I suspected A's on 4 occassions in the M. One night when H came home drunk (which latetly is all the time) not only did we admit to them, but gave me times, places and names with a big cocky smile. I asked if he was serious and he said no. But in light of everything that has happened, all the lies, betryal, how do I know what the truth is?<p>H has lied to me every day over the las 9 yrs. EVERYDAY. He would try to convince you the sky is purple...he is a cut throat, vindictive, name caller that will never change for nobody. He thinks he is above me and everybody he comes in contact, except the people he works with. He is insulting, self centered and cocky. Let me give you an example....<p>We whet to a x-mas party.(last weekend) Outside he said he was hungry for a sandwich. I playfully said, I would rather a night cap..later he comes up in back of me and whispers(I'm sorry if this is to much, but you can't get the full effect of the story if I candy coat it)"so you want me to [censored] you tonight huh?" I said "o.k."(hesatatnt)then he said "I'll tell you what, I'll go to store and get my sandwich, while I'm eating it, you play with yourself, and if I'm turned on after I eat, I'll [censored] you".<p>Nice huh? [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] <p>This is just an example of what I have delt with for 9 yrs. There are far to many more examples simalar if not worse I choose not to post. Now accompany that with all the lies, OW, and secrets, and you all have to come to the same conclusion I did. I will be happier on my own. I will not spend any more of MY time on tring to make things work. It was a one sided thing, and I'm tired, of me and my feelings being put second, getting insulted, put down, walked on cheated on lied to and pushed around. Some marraiges can not and in my case aren't worth saving....

ARPOW,
You are the only one could decide if this marriage is worth saving. No one could, and no one should.<p>Pls, don't take my following words as an insult or out of line. I just try to be your Jimmeny Cricket.<p>You come to MB saying that you want to save M. However 'till now I don't even think that you understand plan A or doing plan A at all. You obsess w/ H's A. Then flirting w/ EA yourself. Yes, H is bad, yes H is verbally abusive, yes he has A. Even you plan to leave this M, what have you learn from this M ?. Could you do self reflection ?, probably you should learn how to draw boundry so that for your next R you could be happy. IMVHO, you should do plan A/B then plan C !. You jump here to only jump to plan C. Use this M as a training ground for you if nothing else.<p>Pls take a hard look and do self reflection. Do you want this M if H could see you and changed ?.<p>God Bless you.