Hi, I just found this site and it has been helpful to release my pain. My H has been having A with OW since Apr this year and I found out about it a month ago. When H started A, we were separated for 4 months because of his job. I caught up with him in Jun and we have been living together since then, but H is so much in love with OW, he did not stop seeing OW even though I came to live with him. We were married last Aug and A started already, H could not wait for me. When I found out about A, H said he wants to get divorce with me since he did such a terrible thing and he thinks that we won't be happy together. I want to keep our marriage still, but seems that it is not going anywhere. H is coming back home earlier than before, but H is still contact with OW, and I think H is telling OW that he will get D with me and M her. I called her once, and since then, she started calling home, harrassing me. Even call me ***** and threat me saying "I will beat you up" I can not believe that H is in love with this kind of woman. I thought H is the nicest person in the world. H says that even though he still loves me, his feeling toward me changed. I want to do Plan A but seems to be difficult.
I have been in deep depression and can not eat... I lost 12lb already. What should I do now? Do I have to wait for him to file D paper?? H only remembers good memories with her and bad memories with me. I think they are really crazy now. Since he still has not filed the divorce paper, I still want to believe that we can recover from this, but without this OW out of our site, we won't make it...

Hi,<p>Welcome to MB. Thanks for telling your story. I will work on getting the welcome packet to you. <p>You have come to the right place. Please check with your local police. If you can, you probably should look into filing harrassment charges against the OW. Threatening you with bodily harm is a crime. If you have evidence (recorded messages, notes, etc.) take it to the police. This will help you file your charges. <p>Your H is not the man you married. The fact that he is dangerously putting such a beast ahead of yourself shows how warped his mind is. With this knowledge, be careful. Show him that you love him but still be careful. Right now your frustration point is not something he can tolerate. <p>Here is the welcome package: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000553.html <p>
Acronyms, etc.
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000557.html <p>Read the info here carfully. The OW seems to still be real pushy. She needs to get tired and over harrassing you. Don't let her fuel your anger. <p>I was so nice to OW in my H's case. She told the WS that she was afraid of me. I really did not do anything to her....yet. Hmmmpph... what does that mean? Just that, I have not done anything to her yet. <p>Take care,
L.<p>[ December 02, 2001: Message edited by: Orchid ]</p>

Orchid, thanks for your reply.
I was thinking about going to police and filing charges against OW. I recorded message she left on ansering machine saying "I will beat you up b****)" This OW is crazy. OW knew from the beggining that my H is married, and still tried to steal him from me. I can not believe all the bad things OW said to me, my H is still in love with her. Does anybody feel that you want to hurt your H/W?? I am feeling like that lately. Since my H is not healing my pain, I started thinking to hurt him. (His career gets hurt if this affair goes in public) I still want to work out with him but it just seems that it doesn't go anywhere... Plan A is good to do, but I can not imagine how much pain BS has to complete plan A. I am just praying that my H gets back to a real world.<p>Shinjyu