5 days ago my husband told me he had a month long affair with a girl at work. he said he ended it and wanted to work on our marriage. he will not consider changing jobs, won't go to counseling and is depressed and won't go to a dr. to get tested for std's or depression.
does this mean i move to plan b?
i told him he had 1 week to make a dr. and counseling appt. or he would have to move out. because nothing he has done proves to me that he wants to work on the marriage. he was not happy about it, but i think he might go ahead and do it. (i think but i am not sure)
this morning i thought --if i had to give this ultimatum to him to do these things then do i even want to wait around to see what happens. the thought of him with her makes me sick and i want him to long for me, want to be with me, be remorseful, and want to get help for us.(he says a counselor will not to any good) not just because i have to give him an ultimatum.
he created this problem and i am having to be the one to direct us to make it right.(reading books, ultimatum, counseling ect.) i want to just leave the state and be with family and let him deal with it and come get me(and our son) when he decides and regrets how much he screwed up.
even if we could work it out--i will feel like he always wonder if she would have been better than me. unless maybe he changes jobs, shows remorse, and treats me like a queen. but is that fair of me?
HELP! i just want to be away from all this.
i have been reading -surviving an affair-the concepts are so hard to do.
heenie
