I posted yesterday for the first time, and I want to clarify a couple things about my situation. I feel really stupid and a little like I belong on the Jerry Springer show. I'm a little embarrassed telling this story, but I need some advice bad. My husband admitted last week that he'd been intimate with OW on and off for the past three years. He says he wants to stop it and to save our marriage. Weird, but when he told me, I just felt numb. I didn't even cry (until later). I knew we had been very distant for some time.<p>This OW is husband's 3rd step-cousin. We had become very close to the whole family in the past few years. They live in another state, but we visited a lot, they visited a lot, etc. I was never worried about him and her, because I thought that even though they're not really cousins, the step thing would matter. In fact, it never crossed my mind. They have a lot in
common, personality-wise, and I thought it was great that he could have fun with her. I, also, was very close to her. I felt like she was
the sister that I never had. She's a very fun and loving person, although I basically hate her guts now. I can't get over how she talked to me all the time and did fun things with me and then screwed me over, so to speak. I never had qualms about the two of them being alone together. He says he doesn't know how it happened, he feels sick, but he says he's worried about her. Admittedly, she's much less stable emotionally than I've ever been, although at this point, I'm probably more of a wreck than her. He says he doesn't know what
she'll do if he quits talking to her altogether. I suggested that we talk to her together, since we both love her (how screwed up is that?) and
then cut off contact until we get our marriage back together. Then,gradually, we could begin to see her again, but never him alone with her. This is going to be very hard to explain, however, because we're so close to the whole family. They will wonder what's going on, and I don't think anyone else needs to know right now. My daughter is also very attached to this person and the whole family. <p>I want to stay married. Despite everything, I love my husband and I know he loves me, too. I've realized that I've basically been ignoring my husband since my daughter was born, thus giving him a reason to
find someone else to turn to. I also admit that I contemplated affairs twice during the past 3 years, but never had quite the opportunity to
follow through. So I know how he was tempted. I just don't know what to do. Help! <p> Posts: 2 | Registered: Apr 2002 | IP: Logged
