When I first posted this it was in the recovery section, I was told to move it to this topic and I may get some better replys. Anyway here goes Maybe someone may shed some new insights for me?
Hello everyone, time to talk, I’ve waited long enough. My D-Day was June 23, 2001. I have a pretty complicated situation. My W had two EMR, of which the first one lasted approx. 45 days and ended up in her submitting to intercourse on the last day, she claims? Two wks later the OM calls her and asks her to move in w/ him and bring the kids. The second EMR started only one month after the first and lasted approx. the same. I was suspicious of the second OM, but had no clue as to the first OM. Both EMR surfaced on different occasions after my 13 yr old son introduced his friends’ fathers to my W. This has all been an utter nightmare for me; I was totally unprepared for the truth. These are the reasons I’m here w/ MB members, seeking wisdom, guidance, and understanding. I came across the MB web site approx. one month ago. My W and I have both read BC, some of the Q/A, and I’m trying hard to apply the POJA and now we have been both monitoring the topic/replies of Wounded Heart’s; “wife’s one time mistake”. My W and I can both relate to this topic a lot and then some. I believe my W and I are both in the acceptance/recovery stage, but I have two huge heart exit wounds and it feels like I’m on a roller coaster ride from hell! It hurts me to even continue w/ this Quest, but I must!
This is my 2nd Marriage and my W’s 1st. I was married to my 1st W for 12yrs 3mos and it will be 16 yrs for no. 2 W on march 31, 2002. I have 3 children form my 1st and 4 from my 2nd.
Here it goes? My D-Day was also The Longest Day of my life it seemed and now after 4 very emotional months I feel my W is still being dishonest. Because before D-Day she denied the second EMR from 10-00 to 06-01, of which time she disclosed the first EMR. This was the shocker that shattered my heart and left a hole in my soul so big, I felt like I honestly needed a Doctor. She held this all in for 10 month, it was my 13 yr old son that had to tell me everything. He said he could not live with it anymore because he seen his mother involved in both EMRs. So when I was focusing all the time on her 2nd EMR, she had already had an EMR no. 1. I’ve never felt so hurt and used in all of my life, I felt I had to find a place to hide from everyone, even myself. She claims that the 1st EMR was brought on when she was introduced to him through our 13yr. My claims she was in a state of low self-esteem and that all this OM had to say is “you sure are a fine looking lady” and the fireworks began, Up until this same M came to our home, I was away at work and he force my W to submit to intercourse. 30 days later she meets AM, her 2nd EMR and starts up with him, and lasts approx. 45 days. She also met this M through my son. I just don’t get it, how could my W do this?? I know she is very sorry, but that’s not working w/ me, my trust is SHOT! I literally feel like I was a sitting duck and didn’t know it. We have both been in plan A for about 3 wks, but before that we were in hell on earth! I believe this should give someone an idea of our situation? I’m new w? MBs so everyone please bare with me. HELP!!!
