Well, here I am in that limbo between Plans A & B. H moved out Saturday night. We didn't get a chance to reach an agreement, so we must still maintain some contact until we do that. Hearing the cold rejection in his voice is like stabbing an icicle through my heart.<P>I'm dying here, folks. Yes, I know it sounds melodramatic. But that's how it feels. I'm trying so hard to "buck up" for the sake of my little girl and baby boy... I finally got some Ensure so that I can at least continue to nurse my baby and to function somewhat.<P>When--and how--does the pain and terrible aloneness begin to wane? How long can I maintain hope for marital recovery without any encouragement? He's only agreeing to a "trial sep" of 6 months to humor me.<P>Please help...and pray. I'm not really a Christian, so prayer is a bit of a mystery to me. But I'm willing to try.<P>------------------<BR>"Some women wait for something to change and nothing does change so they change themselves." Audre Lorde<BR>

Faithfully,<P>This is a hard time...<P>When my W left 3.5 months ago... it was very hard for me too.<P>Now... with this much time passing... I see the next month to month and a half as my time to go to Plan B. And have I been "praying" about this.<P>So much of what to do... when to do it... depends on how much contact you keep with your H... and the quality (LB or no LB) when there is contact...<P>I'm feeling for you...<P>About prayer... <BR>All it is, is a chance to say whatever, to who/whatever you believe gave to you the gifts of your life... <B>you</B>... <B>your little girl</B>... <B>your baby boy</B>... and <B>your H</B>...<BR>Say a word of "thanks"... and ask for "better times"...<BR>"A little conversation with God"... <BR>Answers... come from your heart... that's were God is... <P>Jim<BR>---------------------------------<BR>Where two or more are gathered...

I am so sorry to hear of your pain.<BR>Prayer does help, but if you aren't really a Christian it isn't going to do you any good to pray. The first prayer the Lord hears is the one of repentance. Please stop for a minute and ask Jesus into your heart. It is as easy as A B C . <BR>Admit to Him that you are a sinner. (we all are)<BR>Believe in your heart that He gave His life for you<BR>Commit your life to Him <BR>Then ask for His help. Tell Him all of your fears and pain. Ask for strength and guidance. Give it all to Him.He will carry you when you are too weak to walk on your own.<BR>I just recently found MB and it has truly been a blessing for me. The women's bible study recommended the book The Power Of A Praying Wife. It has helped me tremendously. My prayer life wasn't anything like what it should have been and it showed in my daily life. I guess I always thought prayer should have been a natural instinct or something. But I am learning how to pray and I already see so many positive things happening in my life.<BR>I heard so many times that sometimes God has to break you before He can use you. I truly believe that.<BR>I will be praying for you and your family.<P>...if you have faith as small as a mustard seed....<BR>Nothing will be impossible for you.<p>[This message has been edited by Linda Beth (edited December 14, 1999).]