Anger has arrived. I am 3 months post d-day and my WH continues his A. I have been in Plan A, reading, and doing the best I can to survive. I have felt desperate, lonely, and scared. I have looked for any sign of affection/attention from my WH. I have pledged my undying love for him and have been positive that we will work through this for our kids and ourselves. I have seen cracks in the A, although right now it appears to be getting more intense.

And, now the anger is here. Yesterday I started feeling bitter and resentful. We had a long talk last night (although it was after he returned from OW house!) and he told me that it was getting harder and harder to go to her. He said my actions, not my words, over the past few months have made him realize what true unconditional love is. He said he knows that he will not find that with someone else. But, he did not tell me that it was over with OW. Right now that is the only thing I want to hear.

I feel like I don't love him at times, and this scares me. I do not want my marriage to end, I want the A to end. I don't like feeling like this - where did the anger come from? Is this normal? Will it pass?

Hello willingtowait -- I know it is frustrating and when I found myself in a similar position, I took a mini-vacation to visit my sister and get away from being consumed with the A and my WH.

It took 3 months for the A to subside after D-Day and another 1 and half months after that for it to end.

Focus on you and not him or the A or the OW. Easier said than done, but that is the only way through this. Do something good for you and your kids.

I have to admit, however, that my WH did not flaunt the A in my face as it appears is happening with you. I don't know that it makes a difference --- I knew through snooping that it was still going on and it was really hard to keep my anger in check.

It is a normal reaction and it will come and go throughout this saga. I still go back and forth between "I love him and can withstand this" and "I cannot stand him" and "I just want all of it to go away".

Post as much as you can to get your feelings out in a safe place.