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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 3
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 3 |
Hello
I am new to this site, but have been reading thru alot of posts searching for answers. History: Married 7 years (together 15) no kids. H has been emailing and searching for woman online. He even gives them his cell #. He is emotionally distant, goes to bars all the time and is addicted to vicodin.I could go on and on. I am hurting so deeply. I have always felt we had a solid marriage. Boy was I wrong. I am searching for help and am hoping someone can help. He is 44 and has said jokingly he is having a mid life crisis.Growing his hair long, etc... Its hard to understand a mid life crisis as we have no kids, he has his own business and doenst work much, no pressure at home to clean, cut grass etc... Sorry to ramble, just dying inside here.
Thank you all for letting me vent.
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 1
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 1 |
First, I would wonder why he is doing this. Have you asked??? May be as simple as not meeting his EN? Have you? Please provide some insight to the other side of the story - it is rarely one-sided.
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 3
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 3 |
Bhonest,
Yes, I know I am definatley not meeting his EN"s. I have asked why he is doing these things, but he would rather leave than discuss. I know we are both responsible for the condition of our marriage. The bottom line is, he knew when we married, my desire was to be a wife and a mother, and thru the years he has postponed having a child. he says he wants a family, but actions speak louder than words. So yes, I have put pressure on this issue, but hey, I am 37, he always knew this is what I wanted and I am so afraid if it doesnt happen I will grow old and be a bitter person toward him because of it. I have an appt. with a marriage counselor next week. hopefully I can get a handle on this.
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406
Member
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Member
Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406 |
Welcome sunny1... There is a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> It has a lot of quick links to many of the most important MB sites... Click here ==> General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)About your post... Do start on a Plan A... Check out the post Plan A - 101 (2nd ed.). As part of your Plan A (self improvement)... ...make sure the counselor you see... ...is not a "feel good" counselor! Make sure he/she... focus on a better you... ...to build your marriage... and not encourage separation... ...separation leads to death of marriage. You have my prayers. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Jim / NSR
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