Hello, my last several posts have been not very optimistic but this one I finally hope things will sound better. Nick and I are dogsitting at the moment. The dog is a complete pain but this is the first time in ages that my husband and I have laughed together. I joke because I'm british and OW is American, and this is so not an insult to anyone else, but I was joking that this dog is the and I quote "second yank b!tch I've come to dislike!" He actually laughed! He said "Do you think your funny, because I do and I love you" and gave me a hug.

I know it's not really "recovery" but I finally went to the docs and told him how I was feeling, he diagnosed depression and I am now on meds and he has refered me to a councellor, so at least I can now have someone to help me. My husband has woken up to the fact that I wasn't crying and being difficult for no reason. He said "I'm sorry I've done this to you and I'm sorry your not happy, living with me would be enough to put anyone on anti-depressants, you the most loyal person I know and I love you, she (OW) would never hold a candle to you and she would never be the type of person that I would have feelings for and want a relationship with" Which led me to the "Then why the hell did you sleep with her?" question, the answer, "I wasn't thinking with my head, not the one on my shoulders anyway, and compared to you she was crap" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! OW is crap. This fed my ego somewhat.

So, the thoughts of them together are fading gradually, I told him that I would never forgive him or forget, but we can move on. I'm not really bothered by her ringing anymore, she does p*ss me off but I think that he said "I do" to me and not her. I think this is probably the prozac talking now! I'm just having a fairly ok day and wanted to share it. Granted I'm gonna have bad days which will contradict everything I've just wrote but, hey, one good day is better than one bad day.

Hope everyone is good tonight, and remember what my dad always says "Don't let the basta*ds grind you down"!!