In a prior post I described a brief affair that my wife had with someone that she befriended locally. She met this individual a few times and acted as though he cared until she allowed him to get into her pants. She contracted genital herpes, which in turn she passed along to me. We both cried alot and both feel that our actions triggered this situation, which is only fair. I am still angry and hurt and it is hard for me to think of my wife having sex with another man, as I have always felt that she was special and this seemed to make her seem cheap to me. We are talking more and seem to be doing really well at the moment. We have been intimate and things seem much more clear now. I am, however, insisting that we go through some marriage counseling no matter how good things seem for now. She has always had issues with self esteem and being a young mother. I keep telling her that she did, and is doing, a great job raising our children. I have also told her that waiting to have children until your 30 or older does not equate to one's ability to be a good parent. I also tell her that everyone has had problems, both during childhood and as an adult, and that she needs to realize that the perfect TV sitcom family is not attainable in most cases. It's almost like the models on magazines, they set an unattainable goal that generates disappointment for those who cannot attain that goal. I keep telling myself that I, or should I say we, can use this situation to make our marriage stronger. I know that every case is unique, but how often can a marriage survive an affair? I appreciate the help of those who responded to my prior post and this post.