Zip had a post concerning EAs and sex( I couldn't respond because I have a filtered ISP and they would let me reply) and it made me wonder.<P>How long does it take for an EA to become physical ? I believe my stbx was in an EA for maybe 2 months prior to it getting physical. I asked her if it just happened on the psur of the moment and she said no it took some planning. She went "shopping" with a new "girlfriend" all day. She said it was just a matter of fact since he was meeting all her needs for communication, attention, etc.<P>Any thoughts or experinces out there?<P>------------------<BR>"You can't always get what you want! But if you try real hard,you might just find, you get what you need!"<BR>Mick Jagger

What is stbx mean? <BR>2mos eh? I caught my W in a EA, and the EA<BR>had only been going on for about two weeks,<BR>but much progress had been made towards sx.<BR>The OM was in control, and my W didn't have a clue. Very naive. Her needs , the affection,<BR>attention, compliments,etc..were being met,<BR>so I figure about 2-4 weeks and it would have<BR>happend, THank God I got suspicous. <BR>It all ended, and we are doing great.<BR>Needs bing met are KEY!<P>------------------<BR>jnvc<P>

As far as I can tell, my H met Brazen Hussy and dated for about 4 weeks. I think he knew he had to walk away because things were getting dicey. In fact, I think she was pressuring him for sex....which was her mistake, thank goodness. If she had played the "nice girl" he may have fallen. I didn't believe him when he said things had not gotten that far, but I think I do know because of bits and pieces here and there.<P>------------------<BR>Faith, Hope, Love Remain,<BR>but the greatest of these is Love.<BR>1 Corinthians 13:13

My W has/had EA that started approximately 2 years prior to my confrontation. My guess, since she hasn't acknowledged that she's even had an affair -- doesn't get, or want to get, the EA concept.<P>I had suspicions, addressed them to her over time, but it continued until the proof became too obvious to ignore. <P>I don't think it became sexual, but I do suspect it was going in that direction.<P>--keystone

Hey Guys,<P>Looks like once again I am the odd man out. Over the last few months Val and I have had some very deep conversations regarding her "affair". We had agreed to divorce about a month or so ago when I stopped the Wellbutrin. I only wanted to know if she slept with him because that would make it so much easier for me to say goodbye. She has no reason to lie to me then or now. Everything is out in the open. She denied it staring me right in the puss.<P>I have come to the conclusion that my W did not have sex with him. I was a rotten lousy stinking terrible H and she found comfort in a FRIENDSHIP with someone else. I know what you are going to say. Sorry, don't believe it. Her eyes are truely the gateway to her soul. I do believe her. <P>You guys can't get rid of me that easy and neither can she.<P> <P>------------------<BR>"It's not over till we say it's over! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? H*ll no!" Blutto...Animal House 1984<P>Wishing us all the Best.<P>Medic<P>

My Wife met wankboy about Sept & jumped in probably Oct-Nov.

jnvc,<BR>stbx means soon to be ex-spouse.<P>My EW(estranged wife)said that they had been friends for years and had sat arounf and talked at work until one day they hugged and the sparks flew! I don't know if thats when the EA started or when they decided to make it physical.

My H started an internet affair witha MW who lived 1200 miles away. It started as a friendship, they both enjoy racquetball, he even would share some of the jokes she sent him. Call me niave(sp) but even though there were some issues in our marriage, I NEVER thought he would look somewhere else for love. They began communicating in March of 97, then it became more than just friends by Oct 97. I became aware of it by Jan 98. He had never met her up to this point and when confronted, he ended it. We started conseling, and for some time I thought things were ok. But he must have started back up with her fall of 98, and another "discovery" was made in April 99. At that time, they were planning to meet in Vegas. Once again, I told him it must end, if he went , I would not be here. He tried for the next few months to end it, but was unable. I finally went to Plan B end of July. He has now seen her twice, he dorve to her, her H caught them playing racquetball and my H came back with his tail between his legs, but this month, he went to see her at a tournament.She is still living with her husband, he now knows all and say he is ready to end his marriage. I believe they have now been physical. I am sticking to Plan B for three more months, if I do not feel any progress has been made, I will file. <P>------------------<BR>Susan<P><BR>

I don't know how long it takes I think that it has to do alot with the individual, state of the marriage, ect..<P>I think emotional affairs either multiple or a long standing one will always progress into a physical one. A person in a EA lets go a little more each time it happens, or the more time that they spend with the OP. They will eventually convince themselves that what they have is not what they want and that is when the physical affair occurs.<P>My W had several EA's in about a one to two year period, evenually cumulating in the physical affairs that she had.<P>EA's are a letting go, the physical part is just a matter of time.<P>Jason

my spouse worked with the OP for years before the affair. spouse told me about EA several years ago and arranged to not work with OP. two years ago, spouse let guard down and began flirting again. in two weeks, it was sexual. this just proves that the no-contact rule actually does work, there was a period of over three years when they didn't speak and our marriage was the best it has ever been.