Dear Dr Harley´s
Sorry for my english,when I has 17 years,I was pregnant,and I love this guy very much and married him,after the baby was born we separated each other,and he left my country.
I meet my actual husband,and he was my 2d sexual experience,I had 19 years and I´m not divorced only separated,3 years after I had relations whit my actual husband,I saw my ex husband and I had sex with him. I was dishonest with my boyfrend(actually my husband),I demand a divorce and I said my boyfriend that. One year after I married him,and I love him until now.
My husband suspect that I had sex when I was visit my ex husband and 3 years after we married I said him that.I have 41 years now and the only problem I have whit my husband it´s,he never kiss me again, and he punished me,he doesn´t acept this happen.I try for 14 years but he can´t forget me. what can I do?I love him, but It´s better divorce?I say I love him and I never be dishonest whit him after we married whit anybody it doesn´t enough?,Please help us

Hi Baby 21,

I hope I understand you correctly. And welcome. You are among friends who want to help.

Have you and your H tried to discuss this issue? If you have not done so, please read some of the links on this website.

What country are you from? Can I safely assume this is not how your H treated you in the beginning or your M?

We are from Central America, The first time I told him was 14 years ago(I did not tell him but he question to my son (age 6)all the time, then we stay in conflict state,to state of intimacy,but wen I believe all it´s OK, he´s whitdrawall whit me,I doesn´t do anithing,I respect my marriage and I told him I love him,but my ex husband work whit te competence and all the work problems whit my ex,are my fault because I´m dishonest whit him.I try to mush tell him that it´s not my fault but now I don´t know what can i do it, because I love him, I have 1 child (my first husband) and 2 childs (17) (4) (my second husband), he is a good person,and before he knew my infidelity he was very romantic,and a perfect guy. Now he doesn´t want to kiss me like a husband because he promissed,and never said me I love you,I travel for a weding ,and when I came back he was different, he doesn´t want sex,he doesn´t wan´t talk whit me, and when I talk whit him he said is because my ex husband doesn´t want buying for his company,and I have something whit him,that´s not true, I don´t speak with him,I don´t see him (since our son graduates from school,97)and in this ocation I stay with my husband.well that´s in a few words my problem with him.

This happened 14 years ago, correct? It is time he got over it.

I'm confused, how is your Xh, involved in this today. Did I understand that it has something to do with current H's company?

Have you tried marriage counseling? You have needs that need to be fulfilled. So does he.