Hi Everyone: So at this point after a weekend of talks W has almost convinced me to give it one last chance?? Man don't want to get fooled again. The kids are a big factor. Even with all of my legal leverage in this situation I will miss them terribly during separate living arrangements. On the other hand I will not stay with W because of the kids.

She initiated looking for a new job in the city. Right now she is local with old job. She has also made an exraordinary effort in treating me with respect and "love", you just don't no. She is also agreeing to major IC and possibly MC--been there already. We are also going to follow some marriagge builder steps.

One thing I have difficulty with is that W probobly still loves OM and may forever (I have read her love letters) Ths STD thing bugs me but I can deal with it. Call the OW? I was advised by councel against it due to further comlicating matters (still not sure about this one) THere are a lot of things I'm not sure of. I guess one can speculate for ever. Law suit is not ruled out. I think I'll give it a month at a time with major changes to be made by W and her behavior. Will have to make behavior list of expectations. So thats were I am now. any thoughts? You've been great.

Boken arrow

Found out that W was with other man AGAIN just before Valentines Day! This is strike three with OM!! And she still does not want a DV. Wow, unbelievable!We have been through counceling a year ago,and she was never ready for Plan A and B. I on the other hand was ready to rebuild and save the marriage after strikes one and two..... So she has moved out and I am moving ahead with the DV. Can't take the pain of being deceived anymore. I'm OK however--hanging in there. I have lots of caring friends and relatives to help me. I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciated all of your observations and advice.It felt so good to know that I was not alone!
God Bless.

Broken Arrow--Not broken 4 ever though!

brokenarrow,

I am sorry to hear this, but it seems your actions are reasonable. Have you told OM's W yet? Please do that. Her life is in danger, if she has these diseases and doesn't know it. It can affect her children as well, if she has any.

You both need to be tested for the full suite of STD's.

As for your W, soon to be exW, go for full custody.

God Bless,

JL

I am so sorry to hear the news but like I said previously she sounded like such a cakewoman who found it easy to lie and betray you and put your health at risk. It is wise to go for the divorce and certainly for custody also. It would not be a bad idea as previously mentioned to do a paternity test and contact the OM's wife. You deserve happiness and respect from a spouse not one who constantly cheats, lies and gives you an STD. I wish you luck in finding someone in the future who will truly love, respect and honor the concept of a committment. You are doing the right thing. I wish you luck in a wonderful future for you and your children.