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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 8
D
Junior Member
Junior Member
D Offline
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 8
I strongly suspect that 3 years ago that my husband had an affair with a co-worker. I was clueless as to his involvement with her and then I discovered that he sent her an egreeting card on Feb. 14, 2000 that said, “I’m so horny”. I questioned him, he said that they just friends. I pushed harder and some more details came out, but not much. He would get very angry if I questioned him. I let it go, feeling like I would never get an answer from him. But needless to say my trust in him was gone. If anything physically happened between them, it did not go on for long and it would have just been for sex on his part, as I was 9 months pregnant at the time. Over the last couple of years I have desperately wanted to call OW to see if she would tell me anything. But I did not because they still worked together (different departments) and I did not want to make things difficult or add fuel to the gossip mill. I haven’t asked him about her in a long time. Our marriage is strong and has been for awhile, but I can’t let it go, I still want to know the truth. Fast forward to now. He no longer works there, in fact he is getting to move across the country for a new job. The kids and I are staying here until the end of the school year. So now that he and the OW no longer work together I want to make contact to see if she will tell me anything. I feel I have nothing to lose as we are leaving this town.

What would you do? Since things are very good between DH and myself right, should I bother trying to find out or just let it go?

Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 1
N
nba Offline
Junior Member
Junior Member
N Offline
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 1
Hello, I just recently registered for obvious reasons. My one day my H told me he and his business partner were going to a business meetings that took place in the evening. He and his partner are pilots so they flew. He like usual would call me when he landed somewhere, just for a minute no matter what. That night he did not call and I assumed the plane had crashed since the weather was so foggy near one of his destinations. I called his cell phone several times but received the voicemail on the first ring...the phone was turned off/floating in the ocean. Though finally at 1:00 am I received a phone call I was relieved and in tears. My H told me was drunk and was going to get a room,I questioned the option of having his partner fly him home and that I would pick him up at the airport. The response was that his partner had had a glass of wine and was unable to fly so they were going to share a room. Amidst my crying and him apologizing I hear a female voice though I cannot make out what she says, But my H replies with "I'll be right back," in a sweet longing voice that I once heard upon our parting. I ask who that was, He said he was checking in and that he would have to call me back. A few minutes later he calls me back, I am still in tears from hours of worry and fear of the other possibilities. I do not suspect a thing at this point because the room is silent and I hear nothing but the television, he tells me he is going to shower and go to bed and that he will call me in the morning.
The next morning I call the hotel and ask for his room. They say he has two rooms and connected me to the first, low and behold a woman answers I ask for him, they tell me I have the wrong room. I call the hotel again and hask for the second room, my H answers I asked why do you have 2 rooms under your name and why are there females answering....pure silence. He tells me they were two models he and his partner met and put them up in a room because they felt responsible. Furious I called the other room and asked which of them was with my H last night, said "hold-on". I waited a few moments, to hear my H in the background he says"does everyong have there clothes on" then picks up the reciever and asks what I am doing. I told him that I would not be home when he returns and yelled goodbye. He said nothing happened. Though I still told him that I would not be home when he returned. I packed my bag and drove to place where I could think clearly and called my family to inform them. I recieved many voicemails, (as I did not answer my cell) from him one in which he was in tears begging me to come home, and telling me that nothing happened that I could ask his business partner. I inturn called another partner who met them at this venue and casually asked if had seen my H. He said yes that he saw he and his partner. thought there was no mention of the girls. I kindly asked him if he knew who my H was with and he quickly and stressfuly cut me off. I was furious that all these men were hiding and lying for my H. Especially when I too was aquainted with them at dinners, even in my own home. I wanted to die because I felt so humiliated.
After many thoughts and words with friends and family. I returned one of his many phone calls and agreed to come home ONLY to discuss the situation.
I was dissappointed that his opening response to ME was "SO WHAT HAPPENED?" my blood wanted to boil. The nerve of him asking me "what happened".

He still denies anything happened. But now calls the woman friends that he likes to have around because they are ignorant and fun. I should also mention he had them flown in again to 'party' that weekend after all of this, though I forced my self to go with him, I was not invited. He also had the adacity to ask me to pretend to be his 'friend' not his wife.
And these girls he now employed to work for him. They both now know I am his wife. He had told them when I met them a week before this all happened I was his associate.

I feel like such a fool because I know all of the parties involved.


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