Hi Jazzey. I noticed in Dying's post you had mentioned reading the book, "I Don't Love You Anymore." I was just curious as to your thoughts on this book. Me, personally, am having a very hard time trusting that my anger will actually work towards possibly rebuilding my marriage. I fear that this approach will only push my WW away. And the fact that she's planning to meet OM in Canada doesn't make matters any easier for me either. Did you, or are you actually applying the methods used from the book? Are they really helping you? Helping your marriage any?

I thank you for your input.

Sincerely,
Daniel

Hello again Jazzey. Thank you for your reply and input on this book I'm reading. It seems to be the only route for me to take at this time.

I don't know if you've read any of my posts. At first, W offered to give me the money if I would go file for D. Well, she wrote me tonight to tell me that she will do it herself because she doesn't trust what I may do with the money. Who is the one that should be having a hard time trusting here? I thought that was me!? Anyway, do you think I should still try and apply the methods in this book? Do you think there's any chance of hope if a divorce is made?

Daniel

Hello Jazzey. Things aren't going as well as I'd like for them to be. Got a call from WW today and she was just as cold and cruel as ever. She has given me an ultimatum. Either I am to file for divorce, or she will file and no longer let me communicate nor see either her nor my daughter. Of course I said that I wasn't. And I am not going to either. So she told me to have a nice life and hung the phone up in my face.

She has become a completely different woman as apposed to the one I fell in love with. To keep the child from her father? How much more cruel can you get? She very bluntly said that my marriage to her is holding her back from what she wants to do; which is to go to Canada, marry OM, and, as she put it, 'live life happily ever after....like we were supposed to.' Of course I was dumbfounded not knowing what to say. She hung the phone up once after I told her I wouldn't file and after her telling my D that she could talk to me. She called back and said, "change your mind?". In the background I could here my D crying. I just don't understand how someone could be so cruel. To me, fine, but not to my D. She even said she was having a blast smoking pot and getting drunk. Evidently, everybody at that house either smokes pot or drinks. Being 1200+ miles away, there isn't anything I can do either. Could I somehow report to the authorities that this type of surrounding is being placed on my D???

I think her hostility is an act of desperation. She has blown nearly all of the income tax refund and had to sell her car. She knows that, if she has to file, she will have the cost in driving here, hotel cost, food, and the cost of the divorce itself (which will not be quick and easy for her...I'll make sure of it). She won't have anything left for money after she has to make another trip for the hearing. She's going to need me to file so that she can use that money to marry OM in order to get into Canada. I guess she thinks I'm stupid. I am by far not stupid.

Oh, and to top it all off, I found out today that she had been unfaithfull to me with yet another man awhile back. That makes two. This OM makes the third attempt for unfaithfullness; for they have not met yet. That totals 5. Others feel that I'm a fool for standing for marriage. I starting to consider them being right. I sure don't want to though.

Yes I did read the book entirely. Since then I have read one called, "Hope for the Separated" in which I really liked. There are so many different views on how to persue reconciliation that it is sometimes hard to figure which is right and which is wrong.

Ill try to brief you again soon. Thank you for asking about me though!!

Daniel