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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3 |
i find myself depressed lately.....does this madness have no end....i keep trying to move beyound this point yet i am still wraped up in this blanket of doubt and fear...i find myself consumed by trying to prove that he still is having the affair cuase i have been there, i have been there where i trusted him the 1st time and guess what.....he was still seeing her ...so now what...i should trust him yet again..ha.....here is this man who went about his business for a whole year pretending to "make it work" trying hard i might add but it was all an act.....and now.....now...i am suposse to open myself up to him again....i go thru this rollar coaster of emtions and i cry and cry...and i am angry and depressed all at the same time and....i keep thinking about my daughter and time invested and this love that is just sitting in my gut eating me away inside cause it now feels spoiled ........and just when i think i can't take anymore...he does something that seems so real and i get a glimmer of hope and then...i get a flash back of his email to her telling her that having sex with her for the 1st time is a beautiful thing and so is she and he jus wants it to b as perfect as possible for her.......and then i die inside all over again.......
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Member
Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837 |
Hi Butterfly and welcome to MB,
What have you read from here? Please take a look at the concepts section above. If you can get ahold of the book his needs/her needs by Dr Phil Harley, you will find it quite helpful.
Also you may want to find a good MC in your area or call Steve or Jennifer here at MB. They do phone counseling.
What you are going through it quite normal in this abnormal situation. You are among those who are going through very much the same kinds of emotions. I recommend you read and post. Let us know how you are doing.
take care,
L.
<small>[ April 23, 2003, 01:02 AM: Message edited by: Orchid ]</small>
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,166
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Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,166 |
I suggest getting the book "Surviving an Affair" by Harley. It is particularly good at showing a couple how to rebuild trust, which I am sure is a significant issue for you right now, considering the repeated betrayal. Beyond that, read through my "Path to Recovery" link in my signature line, below.
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