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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 131
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 131 |
Does anyone in the chat group believe that if you have a strong connection with your faith, the likelyhood that you would have an affair deminishes???
I just came back from a prayer group and they seem to indicate that had I found a church in Texas, the likely hood that I would of had an affair would have diminished.
I tried finding a church but gave up in October.
I remember reading a paragraph in a book that said church goers have affairs just like you and I.
However, letting go would have been easier for me if I believed in faith/religon.
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 12
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 12 |
I doubt it would have made a difference. I think that if there is something inside of you that is able to justify having an affair then church is not going to change that. The conviction to remain faithful is either in you or it isn't - and you choose for yourself. If the connection to your spouse is not strong enough to stop you then how can a connection to a church stop you?
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733 |
RANDYRAIL,
This is 2x4. You are screaming and kicking b/c you are dumped by your OW ... you want to revenge ... it fired back at you .... Now you blame faith of your hurt cause by you. What next ? God makes you atheis ?.
During tough time, we show our true color ... you know what color you are, just read back your post.
You are not listening to the replies to you. You jump one thread to a new one when you don't like the reply. One thing that you could follow ... go to IC not MC to resolve your issues ... until then you will not be able to work on M.
To answer your cry from the other thread "why this happpen to me ?" ... this could make you either to become a better person or a broken person ... the choice is yours and no one else.
-rh-
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 131
Member
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Member
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 131 |
No, I was under the impression that since it was a new topic, I should start a new thread. I am unfamilar of the proper protocal but since you made it very clear, in the future, I will keep the thread going.
Just so that you Redhat, my wife and I are reading the repsonses together. My wife understands to a certain extent that I am greiving the loss of a job that I was doing very well at but at the same token the "*****" had something to do with it.
My wife has expressed her concern that I need to support her as well. She wants me to listen and be attentative to her needs as well. I am trying that and I am trying to be next to her side.
The chat group is giving me all sorts of suggestions that I need to follow. My wife agrees that I need to let go. I am trying to do that.
It is not that easy!!!!!!
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,049
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Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,049 |
Randy, I would suggest going to the book store or ordering on-line the book Torn Asunder by Dave Carder. He is a pastor who specializes in Infidelity Counseling. He makes it clear that anyone can be subject to an A under the right circumstances...even pastor's, priests, etc.
This would be a great book to read with your wife. Really goes into detail from both sides BS and WS...does great job of outlining the steps to recovery, as well.
Glad to hear you wife is reading here, as well.
Spending as much quality time together as you can now will greatly benefit the two of you.
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733
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Member
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733 |
RANDYRAIL,
Don't get me wrong about 2x4 you. It is not soo much about the # of thread but all has the same theme ... YOU CAN'T LET GO !. Many has try to steer your focus on what is important but to no avail. I will post to your other thread and BTW ... unless you are rude and disrespect other poster you are always welcome here. However this site is about working on M, otherwise many will fry you up but moderator won't banish you.
-rh-
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 36
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Member
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 36 |
Randy Rail, I don't think finding a church would have helped you, it has to be in your heart. Going to church does not make it right or wrong, my H is having an affair and the OW professes to be so religious (she has been married four times and one of her ex husbands was a preacher) That is what you call a hypocrite. Don't get me wrong going to church has to be for the right reasons. So sorry for all your problems.
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