Yeah... I know about this 'soulmate' thing. H and I were soulmates too - you automatically feel that way when you're in love.

I've ordered SAA online today and I can't wait for it to arrive in my mailbox.

I read all the 'doormat' stuff and it's a wonderful inspiration to me (everything written on MB is practically lightening up my days and ways to act).

We didn't tell son the facts today afterall.
H said to me that he didn't know how to - and I actually acted very kind and civilized - I'll let it all be up to him to find out when and how. As long as I'm present when he (we) tell about the affair and that dad don't want a future with me as his wife.
H said today that maybe we should go into counselling afterall since that what we promised our son to do a week ago. (Yesterday H said that he didn't want councelling if I had ANY hope that it would make him want to continue the M).

Marriage so far:
Before H went on his 5 week trip to Spain there was love and understanding. He was very grateful that I let him travel for that long, and I was feeling good and secure about the M. He was too I'm certain! He asked me at one point if I wanted to go with him but it was not possible (job, son, finances)
4 years back we had some arguments and trouble in the M, but we talked about it and we began being more caring and nice for eachother. Sex has always been great even though he needs sex more than I do. He'd love to have sex every day and I've always thought that 2 - 3 times a week was good for me.
These days - since I found out about the A - he don't wanna touch me at all.