This Post is for our friends on the other end who are trying to restore. No negatives Here.<P>I'll start.<P>She said: "You are the most moral person I know. How do you do it?"<P>"You must love me, Otherwise why do you put up with me?"<P>"You look really handsome, here, let me fix that sorrow in your eyes."<P>There is many more but this should start. Betrayers, feel free to use them. I hope it helps. <P><p>[This message has been edited by fighter (edited June 10, 1999).]

Fighter: Thank you for those kind words. It does help to know that there is SOME hope out there.<P>------------------<BR>Rachel :)<BR>

I sent this one to my H just now...it's borrowed from a song (see like we were talking about Sailor )...anyway it means a lot to me...<P><BR>"...your words keep me alive...<BR>I would be the one to hold you down<BR>kiss you so hard,<BR>I'll take your breath away..."<P>-Sarah McLachlan 'Possession'<P>thanks fighter.<P>-rjr

"Please hold me"

Cam, Its' past time to start moving in a positive direction. So lets post positive things that will help heal.

Our son could grow up to be the president. With your brains, and my commonsense.... Seriously!!!<P>My family? They haven't a clue. You have better morals and values.<P>That was a love deposit!!!<P>A comment last night:<BR> Me: You are making me so happy. I'm really feeling that you aren't cheating anymore.<BR> Him: I haven't changed. It's you that has changed. I love my wife.<P><BR>I don't ever want a divorce again. I love my wife.<P>I want to start making some long term plans with you.<P>

I still don't trust his words. He has done many things that make me want to start trusting him again.<BR>-He is being more attentive to me. Like we were when we first met<BR>-He is taking initiative to show me that he is serious to repair the damage done.<BR>-He is diong things he has never done before.<BR>-He listens and really tries to understand.<P>OH!!! I do remember something he said!!! I was very emotional one day (DUH!!) and told him I wasn't sure it could really ever work for us anymore. I told him I didn't know what I wanted. He told me I wanted HIM. Not the stupid "him" but the "him" I fell in love with. He said that "him" will exist and that he will hold on for me. That I don't have to trust now. He will stay and work and someday I will realize that he is all I need.<P>The other thing he does is just hold me. He used to kind of back away when I cried. Now since it is more often that I cry, he just holds me and reassures me. I need the non sexual touch ALOT and he is finally figuring that out. Not that it stays nonsexual.... And that is fine, too!!!

"I love you, only you"<BR>"I'm sorry beyond words....."<BR>"I will never let go of you, you are the most important person in my world"<P>I also made him a set of tapes.... music that expresses how I feel about him. (I started it before all this mess, and I finished it when we were seperated). The most important one...."Cross My Heart" by George Strait ~~ it was the song we danced to at our wedding......<BR>"I cross my heart and promise to..... do all I can to make all your (our) dreams come true......"<P><P>------------------<BR>God will not give me anything I cannot handle. That which he gives me will only make me stronger.<P><BR>

Tomorrow starts right now, and I'd do anything if you'd share tomorrow with me. I love you.<P>------------------<BR>I have been given the chance. So I'm going to be the great husband and a wonderful father my wife and kids deserve.<P>

H said...<P>"I love and have only loved you"<P>"I want to die in your arms when we are old"<P>"I'm sorry, sorry, sorry"<P><P>------------------<BR>Joan

I love this.<BR>One of the wonderful things my husband has said is: If I only would have known how to meet your needs better, you would not have even needed or wanted anyone.<BR>I said - "I am NOT going anywhere - we have time if you are sure YOU still want me!"<P>We have realized we have no place to go but UP - therefore, we have learned to say the "hard" things too.

You Win,<P>I know what you mean about the "hard" things. The nice thing is, now we can say them correctly thanks to counseling, and we have decided that nothing one of us could say could be worse than losing each other (again). <P>Another Quote~~~~~~~ "Let's remember to tell our grandkids about *this*" (*whatever we are doing/talking about*) I like this one best, because we don't even have kids yet, and we have had some "hard" talks about things related to *kids*. <P>Dawnetta<P>------------------<BR>God will not give me anything I cannot handle. That which he gives me will only make me stronger.<P><BR>

How about these? (Which I have said and MEANT truly)<P>You ARE the love of my life<BR>I can never imagine living without you<BR>I want to grow old with you, and it just be you and me<BR>I wish we could be deserted on an island, just like that three hour tour, only just you and me<P>Coming from a former betrayer, who loves her husband so much..<BR>

My H said:<BR>Are we doing the right thing (by staying together)?<P>I said:<BR>I know what I want. I want YOU. I want OUR life back.

I thought this post should come back up to the top for some of the newer people and some of us that have been here for a while. It helped me feel better today.

"I made a promise to god, and will share it with you. I will never do anything that will hurt you." <BR>"I am so very sorry that I brought all of this into our marriage and our home."<BR>"I never wanted you to see that I had this problem. It was too sick to talk about with the only person that I love."<P>He really is a great guy, is trying so hard, and making a lot of progress daily!! Thanks sam, excelleant idea to bring this back up.

OK, I'll bite,<P>Val:<BR>"Please don't give up on us".<P>"I don't want a divorce".<P>Fighter, I have nothing but the upmost respect for you and Chris. You guys are the rock of Gibralter! I always look forward to your posts. The courage and determination that you show in your posts is nothing short of sainthood. You guys have helped so many of us that you will never know. I am so glad that I found this place.<P>Wishing us all the Best<P>Medic

My H seems to know all the right things to say to me these days.....<P>"If I could take it back I would...in a heartbeat."<P>"You mean the world to me, and I'm going to spend the rest of my life trying to prove that to you."<P>"I was insane to take a chance of losing you."<P>"After what I've done I can't make you stay with me.....but I can tell you it'll break my heart forever if you leave."<P>"When we're 122 years old I'll still be chasing you around the house- and I won't give up until I catch you."<P>He told me Sun. his memory of the first time he ever set eyes on me (where we were, what I was wearing, who I was with)-in grade 7, I didn't even know he existed for another year, we didn't date until grade 12.<P>He dedicated "Your Love Amazes Me" to me on the radio.<P>It's amazing how you realize how much someone means to you...when you almost lose them.<P>

ME: You know I don't want a divorce.<P>HER: Well, I don't want a divorce either.<P>It's a start.........<P>------------------<BR>Rutger......One day at a time.<P><BR>

Me: When I said I wanted a divorce, I didn't mean it.<P>Him: When I said I didn't care if you wanted a divorce, I didn't mean it either.<P>This is where the hugs <B> should </B> have come in, but didn't. But like Rutger says, it is a beginning. Hey, a "new_beginning" <P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>Marriage: the most important contract you'll ever enter into, and the most sacred.<P><BR>