FIL is pissed off big time at Donna. When we went to the funeral, Donna left a day before we did, so we got to spend some time together. Anyhoo, I told him I was sorry for what’s going on and he knows it’s not my fault (as such). Well, he dropped me, SIL & BIL off at the airport. WE gave each other a hug and he kissed me on the cheek & he said I love you. Wow! Coming from him that’s something! He’s retired AF & EXTREMELY pro military. If you ain’t in the military, you ain’t sh*t is sorta his motto. We all wore our dress blues for the funeral.<P>He has been calling her since we got back & letting it rip. Told her I’m a good H, not perfect, but nothing we can’t fix. Told her to quit acting like a tramp & he’s dumping her off the will, wankboy will NEVER be part of the family. All that kind of stuff. Her entire family is on my side. Her brother, who’s in the Air Force told her if she takes any of my retirement, he’s gonna fly to where she is & kick her a$$!<P>So, it looks like she’s not gonna have much of a family.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

one word, chris: karma.<BR>9 months today, right?

Hey Chris,<P>This is one area where you have me beat hands down. My inlaws helped to hide the affair from me. They lied about her whereabouts and bought into the propaganda that Val spread. She can lie like a brick rug.<P>But for you, This will help your cause greatly, they are behind you.<P>I called about 2 months ago, spoke to both of them, and let them know that I was sadly disappointed in their behavior and participation in their daughters affair. I tried to deliver the message as non blaming as I possibly could.<P>Yeah, I know love busters but at the time I didn't give a rats behind and felt that ridding my system of the hatred of them was well worth it in my opinion.<P>Anyway, things are going very well for me right now. I was more that suprised that they send my a Christmas card. I was going back and forth about sending them one. Now they just upgraded to a Hallmark card. I'm going to push my luck and see if it would be ok to stop by on Christmas day to wish them well. <P>Wishing us all the Best.<P>Medic on a mission.

Chris, don't hope for too much from her family's efforts. Unfortunately, when they have their heads ... well, you know ... they see this as persecution instead of as consequences. My SILs want nothing to do with the slug - and my husband is insulted.<P>Christmas oughtta be interesting!<P>------------------<BR>terri<BR>I believe in miracles...<P><BR>

10 months today (17th) <P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

Chris,<P>My ILs are way on my side. Robin thinks they don't have unconditional love for her.<P>They think she screwing up royaly, and need to remove her head from her ... .<P>FIL said LRB willnever be part pf his family.<P>What Robin can't see( too much fog ) is she's the one that turned her back on her family. She doesn't talk to them because sge knows she is wrong. <P>So far this has donr zip to get her out of the fog. Reality means she has to deal with the repercussions of her selfish actions.<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Chris,<BR>WOW! That is wonderful that you have the love and support of her family. Believe me, I know how nice that can be. I hope she takes what her family is saying and listens. Dreams do come true this time of year.<BR>Viki<BR>

Chris, <P>While it's great to have that support from her family (and I had the same from my wife's family---the FIL thing to a "T"); you must be very careful to not appear that you are either participating or instigating that "abuse" from her family.<P>It's very important. You cannot afford to be associated with the "lovebusting" behavior that is coming from your FIL.<P>But, good for them!!!

i long to talk to my mom about our mess! i long to tell the H's folks.<P>due to many circumstances we have not: my dad has alzheimers & he & mom live in an assisted living center. i don't think i could saddle mom with more troubles/worries.<P>his folks don't keep much quiet. they tell their siblings (the H's aunts & uncles), and the H's siblings. one of the H's siblings has a FIL associated with my H's job. we know that if all this gets back to people at H's job, it could be difficult for him/us.<P>we have told them we are struggling, but no details.<P>i'm glad for you that you have your in-law's support, whatever their reasoning.<P>lostgirl

k, I know. I’m not instigating anything. She hasn’t accused me of it either. She knows she f@cked up. She also knows her father. He drinks all the time. He has only taken her out once in the last year. That was for a bowl of clam chowda on their anniversary. He is one who should have been dumped a long time ago. Anyway, he was yelling at Donna, “he may not have been the best husband, but there are a lot worse. He doesn’t go out to bars all the time like I do!” He was sticking up for me big time.<P>Love busting is not in my present vocabulary.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

There's that alcohol again... <P>Chris, why don't you learn about Adult Children of Alcoholics... that may give you some different insight into your wife's situation...