For the first time the other day my wife said that she "wasn't sure" what she wanted. I didn't even ask her. That is a far cry from previous statements made by her when she said that she didn't want anything to do with the marriage. She said that right now she wants to be my friend because there is not and never has been anyone who knows her so well.

Well, she was supposed to come over tonight for supper and to see our daughter but just called a few minutes ago saying that she couldn't make it because she had a hard day at work. I asked if she was just going to stay at home alone tonight to rest and she said that she was staying home but didn't know if one of her friends were coming over or not. It is times like these that make me feeling like just giving up. I feel like she had plans to come over for supper but maybe something better came up so she cancelled. Maybe I am just jumping to conclusions but either way it hurts.

I had been going through a period where I hadn't really been contacting my wife, she had been the one calling me. On Saturday she came over and we had what I thought was a good talk. It basically started with her saying out of the blue "I don't know anymore what I want." She also said one of the biggest things that keeps her from wanting to try is because she knows that she wronged me and hurt me really bad.

BTW, many people here probably don't know about my story because although I read here every day, I have only posted a few times. If anyone is interested, my story is here.

It sounds like you have given her all of the power to make decisions that deal with your marriage. She seemingly feels that you will accept anything and everything and you react to her every comment. Maybe if she knew that you also have options in this marriage and how you wish to live your life in the future and are determined to be happy with or without her; she would think twice about what she is doing and how she is treating you. She justs seems to feel that you will always be Mr. safetynet. She needs to realize that you have no intention of being the doorprize in your marriage. Her attitude is very selfish towards you and your child.

Amen Bryanp!!!

This is something very new to me and I am not even sure if i am doing it right. I cought my H though a PI after having the gut feelings. He at first denied the entire thing until I put the photos in his lap. He works with her.He moved outfor about three months and wanted to come home and try and work things out. I had several conditions as to his return. The main one was that he was to have no contact with her outside of the necessary business related contact. As far as I know this was done up until a month ago. The company he works for has employee lease options on vehicles. He needed a larger vehicle for the weekend so whose car did he use? You guessed it Hers. Now after being gone for 3 weeks he returned to work and she ran straight to him with accusations that I had called her father and her ex telling them that they ( he and she) should be ashamed of themselves driving me to the nutty house and that he should think of his 4 children (8, 5, 3, 1). I did not do this and yet he feels that she would not do something like this. I plainly told him that if he believed her to pack his bags. Am I crazy to think that she could be making this up to have him. I have no idea who would do something like this or who would have the information to even contact these people. Does anyone have any advice or ideas or maybe you have been there. I love him and want to try to rebuild our marriage. Am I wishing for the impossible? Thanks in advance.