It's been a week since my H moved out and the affair was ended. BTW, affair ended because OW found out we were in marriage counseling and H didn't tell her, not to mention I told her I wanted my H back.

It seems to me that as I remember my conversation with the OW, she never told me that she "loved" my H. I thought this was interesting in light of the fact that she could give him up so easily. I get a sense that maybe she wasn't "in love" as he was and that the A was a bit more one sided. Regardless.

For the last week, my H only took a few things that he needed. But as of today, he emptied his dresser and has pretty much taken all of his personal effects. Part of what kept hope alive for me, don't get me wrong I still have plenty left, was that his clothing was still here pretty much. However, when I got home from work today and it was all gone it makes it seem more final and that perhaps he's not coming back.

Could anyone else speak to this? I know he's only been out of the A for 1 week and he's still in withdrawl, etc. should I be freaking out or just take it for him needing clothing??? Interestingly, he took his jewelry box that has his rings (including the wedding ring). He hasn't worn any of them in months so it's interesting to me that he took them.

Waiting to hear. . . . .

Hope,

My best guess is to just 'chill'. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Seriously, 1 week after his A blows up, and shortly after leaving home the actions can seem pretty strange. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> So, go about your business, do what you have been doing, and allow him time to go through withdrawal. I would imagine he feels pretty down. He has made a complete fool of himself with you and family, and he then gets shot down by OW. I would guess some wound licking is going on right now.

So I would say, don't read anything into it yet. Just assume he needs clothes and his wedding ring. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

God Bless,

JL

Hi Hope,

I second what JL says...besides which, your H is mad at you! You (in his mind) ended the A by talking with OW's H, and then subsequently spilling the beans by being honest with OW. Maybe it simplifies it too much by calling it running away from home but isn't he living with his mom?

I know you'd rather he was there with you... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> ...but keep on Plan A'ing...there are so many stories here of spouses moving out and moving back in once their heads have cleared. Concentrate on you and the kids and let H have space to ponder life's realities...

hugs to you...awed