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#440107 11/21/03 09:35 PM
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 3
D
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Joined: Nov 2003
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It's now been 10 days ago since I found out. Now I feel like I'm just here don't want any comfort any affection from him I'm just tired. We have since started couseling one session so far which really help. But still I don't know what to do he wants to be comforted and I can't seem to begin or start were to pull comfort from for him or me. Help! Help!

#440108 11/21/03 10:45 PM
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 4
L
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I think that you should look into yourself and figure out if you really want to forgive him. If the answer is yes, try to do things as normally as you would if it would've never happened. Don't go out of your way to comfort him, but try to be the same person you were before and you'll notice that things will slowly go back to being the way they were before. That's part of forgiving. And it's awesome that you all are in counseling so soon- that really shows that you love one another and will do whatever it takes to be happy again

#440109 11/21/03 11:38 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 297
S
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Posts: 297
DEARSHYKEN


What you are feeling is normal. When someone betrays us it hurts a lot. Perhaps, you’re a little depressed? Medication can be of a real benefit in these situations.

Have your read “Surviving and Affair” by Harley. There is a bookstore on the main page of the MB website. SAA will help validate your feeling and give you some tools to work with that can help both you and your H meet each other’s emotional needs.

Try to minimize angry outbursts, demands and disrespect. I know he has hurt you terribly but try to control negative emotions as best you can. Has H agreed to NO CONTACT with OW?

I know that it is hard to believe but it will get better with proper counseling, support and time. Keep posting and we will try to be there for you while you go through this ordeal.

Beau


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