Background: I have an the lowest of the low. Over the course of my marriage I have had 4 PA's and an EA. The last time was in 97.( I figured it out by where I was working. I really don't remember the time). In other words I have not business to complain about anything my wife says or does.

In Aug. my W told me she liked this guy and thought he was attractive. They shared an office at the time. They began calling each other frequently, text messaging each other many times daily,and having lunch together everyday. The OM was having marital problems and my W said she was trying to be a friend nothing more.

6 weeks ago, I told her about the past A's as a result of IC and MC. Since this has come out she told me she talks to the OM about the situation. Last night she told me that I don't know anything about her and that people at work know her more than I do. (I wonder if it's him she meant.)

Sorry this is so long, I just want to know, according to MB this is an EA. But in her emotional devastation should I just leave it alone, will it drive her further away, if I act on it?

Anybody? Please?

the lost cause -

This is how PA's start. Very few WS's just decide one day to have an affair. They gradually get sucked into one, by having their needs met outside the marriage.

Time for you to get busy filling your W's emotional needs. Print out the EN questionnaire here and ask her to fill it out.

Both your wife and OM should be working out marriage problems with their spouse, not each other.