3mth ago i found out that my husband was having an affair with a women he had met on a internet chat room. I was absolutely devestated.

We had only been married 6wks when he started seeing this women and i really cant believe it. I went on to find that he had posted himself as single in a number of chat and dating rooms along with some awful photos of himself.

I have said that we will try to carry on as i do love him but i feel terrible, im depressed all the time and i have no trust in him.

Has anyone gone through anything similar. My friends think i am stupid for staying but we have a daughter. I feel so alone.

The women was 10yrs older than me but i found emails from her and him saying how much in love they where. As soon as i found out he said it was all a mistake.

I just dont know what to do, i know i cant go on feeling like this for much longer, i just want it to go away, but will it?

Thanks for letting me rant,

Jenn

Jenn
I'm sorry that you have had to come here. The past few months must have been torture. You have come to the right place though. There are great resources here, so you can learn about yourself and grow.

I too was a BS and I tried to make things work with WW, but she just didn't want that. There is hope for you though and you should do everything in your power to make it work and you will be rewarded for it. Improve yourself, grow in confidence and love.

Best wishes.

Thank you do much for taking the time to reply to me, Ridingtherollercoaster. Im trying to hang on and be strong but sometimes it just seems to hard. Im so sorry to hear about you. How do you feel now?

Im going to try my best to grow.

jenn im sorry to see you here bacause it means that things dont seem so good right now but they will get better! there are many great books that people talk of on this site "His needs/Her needs" is one of them "surviving an affair" is another. get them both they will help out alot.
as for how you feel it takes alot of time to feel right again, its been weeks for me and I still sometimes dont know up from down, come here vent here we are all here for you.
(BS) betrayed spouse
(WW) or(WH) wayward husband or wayward wife are just a couple of abbreviations they use. I wish i could offer advice but as a newbie here myself i might give bad advice more than helpful advice but I am always on here if you need some one to bounce your words off of.

my prayers are with you
cliff

I too have the same question... "Will it get better?" I just want to say thank you for answering my post. Unfortunately, I don't have a whole lot of advice. I found out 4 days ago and I'm going through living hell. Wish I could help. Try to hang in there and know that it will get better eventually. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Yes it will get better. I was just like you and miserable. I thought my whole life was ruined. If you read the information and posts here, and start to understand the problem, things will get much better.

Hang in there and keep posting and reading.

Will it get better? That is my question too. In my case, I don't see any sign. But i am outting my faith in GOD. He will know what the result is. I am just hang on here.

I asked the question, will it get better? I thought that i would be feeling a little better by now, but its 4 1/2mths since i found out about the affair and i still cant pick myself up.
I went to the Dr last week and they have put me on prozac. Im hoping that in a couple more weeks i will start to feel better but i dont know wheather i am hoping for a miracle pill.
I also made a copy of all the emails i found between my H and OW when i found out about the affir (thats how i found out). I gave the disk to my best friend to keep safe but yesterday i got it back and re read the emails. They are soul destroying, going on about how much they love each other and how amazing their sex life is and how its never been better. I dont know what to do, should i destroy the disk? or keep it? I cant stop crying today.

My H says hes so sorry and never meant any of the things he said to her, it was all a game that got out of hand.
How do i believe him? How can i trust him?

Im so confused.

Jenn - I would keep the disk in case you need it in the future. Don't re-read the emails though - that can continue to depress you. Do what you can to be happy -- decided after my WH's EA that I can't fix him or make him anything I want him to be BUT I can do things to better myself and be happy.

Keep posting -- we are here to help

<small>[ April 15, 2004, 12:25 PM: Message edited by: lovemyhubby ]</small>

Had a really rough weekend, huge fight with H yesterday, his parents came down in the middle of it.

His parents know all about the affair he had, in fact its nothing his dad hasnt done himself. They asked why we where fighting and H told them it was about the A. His dad turned to me and said if i dont have any trust i should just end it, he made me feel like it was my fault!
I want to be able to trust him again, but how? How do you put all your trust in someone who a few mths ago destroyed everything you believed in?

H also thinks that if he lets me have a rant it will all be forgotten about and ill be fine again.

All i want is a normal happy, trusting marriage. Surely that is possible?