How do you stop obsessing over the A?

I can't get the images and thoughts out of my head. It's been six months since I found out. My WH refuses to do a NC letter, says he doesn't know what he wants and loves both me and the OW. I have filed for a divorce and he is going along agreeing to give me "everything", really. He signed the prelim order on Tuesday and he pays for everything and will move out by JULY 1st. It's everything I can do not to send this nasty ho's buttnaked pictures to everyone we know including my inlaws. In the beginning of the A's exposure, my WH said he was going to marry the OW.
Now he's not sure what he wants to do... I'm going crazy... he's sleeping in the guest room... I CAN"T live like this another second... I can't stop replaying their email "love" letters over and over in my mind.... My soul is dieing... my heart is breaking and I can't stop my mind....

I've tried staying busy... doing things for myself and taking anti-depressants... nothing helps me stop my mind doesn't matter what I do ... someone HELP ME PLEASE.

I have read the "Surviving the Affair"... I have read tons of books... and I know what to do I just can't make myself do it... I just want it all to stop and I can't make it... any suggestions?

When I found out about my WH affair I exposed it and now over a year later he is still in a fog. What can I do to get him out of the fog?

Well this weekend was fantastic... not sure why at all... we just kinda stopped fighting. I think mainly I stopped obsessing!!! I just figured if he wants to leave his brand new house and everything in it for some white trailor trashy ho... let him... The kids and I will be just fine without him and I told him as much. I told him I had filed divorce and that he could take himself right over to that skank... live with her for awhile... and although I am not sure what's happened but everything was normal this weekend????? We didn't talk about it at all... just let it go and had a great time. There's a site called break free from the affair that has tips on how to stop obsessing... guess they helped me.... So who knows what will happen next I am just taking it one day at a time...

btw...

I did expose the affair!!! I told her at a game (my son and hers are on the same sports team) that she could leave my H the F*&( alone or I would be more than happy to share her pinups with everyone and just for good measure I brought a few to give her so she knew I wasn't kidding. That was last weekend.... I think she was floored... my H told me I could keep it up and she wouldn't want him either.... LOL!!!!

Read most of this thread and found it interesting. I too am struggling with the exposure. I admit to my own failings in our relationship and have already started to fix them, not only for her, but because it is the right thing to do.

I have never said a bad thing about my wife to anyone. I have always bragged about her, even when I didn't feel like it. It is a loyalty thing with me for anyone I care about.

I fear two things about exposure. She will say bad things about me to justify the EA. And if we manage to reconcile she will not want to be around the people who knew about her failing.

As another note. Should you expose this to your teen children?

My story is my wife has entered into an internet EA with someone thousands of miles away. She is convinced our marriage is unsalvagable, (most of the time) I know she would be embarrassed. As I would for her indescretion.

I recently took a class on helping children adjust with failing marriages. Their advice was to never (NO MATTER WHAT AGE 6 months - 56 yrs old) expose children to the sorid events of the affair. Now in my case, my foggy WS decided to take our kids to dinner and tell them he was marrying the OW. Now, of course, he hadn't filed for divorce... nor had he even told me everything yet. OH WELL... now my kids 12 and 9 are having a very difficult time... my son blames himself since my H met her at his extra-curricular activity... (her son and my son are in the same sport). Anyway, it's just gone from worse to ugly.. so IMHO, which btw, isn't worth much these days... I would keep it from the kids if you can. I know that it is easy to want the kids to side with you... to know exactly what their mother is doing or about to do to their lives, however, speaking from experience... I would like to jerk a knot in my WS's aspirations each time I look at my son's face when he tells he dad to give up his gf. I would do anything to spare my son from that...more likely than not the kids will find out anyway if you decide to expose the A... esp... if you are from a small town (seems everyone knows). I have told my inlaws (who say they just want their son to be happy and want to stay out of the middle... of course, they've also told me he really can't love me and do this to me so I should just cut my losses and be happy too... interesting isn't it?) My parents didn't help either... they have tried to be supportive of me of course... but my dad is so angry he won't speak to my H and now family get togethers seem impossible) I think if I had my druthers I wouldn't have told anyone but my therapist.... because now everyone is full of advice but noone has bothered to say anything to him. So it didn't work out well for me when I exposed the A... just ended up making things much worse.... b/c noone wants to help they just avoid us or offer so much advice to me it drives me crazy...

That's my two cents worth... good luck