I don't know whether to apply the advice given here or just be angry with my H. I have terrible mood swings(could be post partum also), I want to divorce H a couple times a day, smother him in love and apologies, call him frantically when he leaves the house, have an affair myself! I feel crazy! I keep on hearing the voice that says "once a cheat always a cheat"
Here's a little background: During my first pregnancy 3 years ago, my husband started acting emotionally distant & angry, acquired a cell phone without my knowledge & purchased a po box to get the bills sent to; It did not take me more than a few weeks to figure it out. I was horribly baffled and devastated! At a time when I needed my H the most and felt the closest to him(we had suffered two miscarriages the previous year and I was so excited for us), he all of a sudden loved me but wasn't "in love" with me-I had driven him away because I did not care about him, etc. etc.. Turns out he was seeing a girl with 3 children that worked at a strip club he visited once. Classy, huh. I could not believe that this was the same man I married. He was not remorseful and could not even tell me for months(in fact, until I had the baby) whether we were going to stay married. We did stay together and things got better between us. This was 3 years ago.
Unfortunately, I just had a baby 3 weeks ago(our 2nd which he finally convinced me to have! He was going to make everything up to me!) and I simultaneously found out the week previous that he got drunk on a business trip and hired an escort service. Again, I am so amazed that he could do this to me again!!!! I feel like a fat fool! He admitted after only a few minutes of coaxing on my part-only half truths of course like he canceled the service at the last minute-did not do anything, etc. . This time, it is a little different which confuses me also: He is very sorry, very attentive, bought me jewelry, wants to work on our marriage, etc.
I don't know what to do especially with 2 little ones, the older who idolizes his dad.
