I just joined this message board tonight. I had heard that there is some type of computer software out there that you can spy on your spouse. I've been looking through all the messages, but can't find any info on it. If someone could let me know what the software is, I'd be very grateful!
THANKS!!
Tricia

~~~~~
Well, I found the software by doing a search online. I bought it and now I'm having nothing but trouble with it. I contacted the company, hopefully they will email me back before my husband comes home!

<small>[ October 15, 2004, 03:32 PM: Message edited by: mommy2xs73 ]</small>

I used SpectorPro. There are free keyloggers out there, but the trial version alert you that it is on when you start up. Not very covert.

SpectorPro can be installed in stealth mode and can't be detected. It can send his emails to your email box when he opens them.... capture any chats he has and record his keystrokes.

Worked for me. Others will probably suggest other software, too.

~ Snow

Sorry you're having problems. I hope it gets resolved quickly.

Hello, i'm a man and I have one question... how can you be married to a man you don't trust? If you are wondering where he has been on the internet or in e-mail... just ask him... again.. If you don't trust him he might not trust you.

I'm not trying to be a smarty pants, but... my wife cheated on me and we are now divorced... My other question is... how long do you except the idea of having to check up on him?

hitek39 "Smarty Pants"

"Get real"

Why in the world do "you" believe we are all here for?????? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

What do "you" have to "offer" here in MBers other that you got "betrayed on" and you are now divorced???? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Sorry for being so blunt but your reply did shake me up!!!!

I am now going into the 4th year of recovery and "checking up" did for sure have a "positive" outcome.

bb

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by hitek39:
<strong> Hello, i'm a man and I have one question... how can you be married to a man you don't trust? </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ya know, it is very difficult to be in a marriage with a spouse you mistrust (as you apparently know). In my case, I used the software HOPING that I was all washed up, a lunatic, a paranoid crazy woman. But I wasn't. My instincts and gut reactions were dead on.

We chose to rebuild and have done so successfully. If not for the software, I might still be accusing myself of being paranoid.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by hitek39:
<strong> If you are wondering where he has been on the internet or in e-mail... just ask him... again.. If you don't trust him he might not trust you. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This made me laugh. Ask him? Well, I guess she could, but there is a 99.9% chance he'd deny it and reaffirm that she's crazy. If he IS cheating, then he doesn't deserve her trust. Who cares if he might not trust her?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by hitek39:
<strong>I'm not trying to be a smarty pants, but... my wife cheated on me and we are now divorced... My other question is... how long do you except the idea of having to check up on him? </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, I stopped checking about a week after dday, with a few peeks here and there. The software is no longer on our computer because my faith in him is restored. We've been in recovery a little over two years.

But I'll tell you, if he ever starts repeating the patterns that tipped me off he was cheating the first two times around, you can bet I would do whatever I had to in order to get the proof I would need. I'd use it in the divorce.

Hope this helps.

~ Snow

hitek39:

I should probably start another thread 2 ask you my 2uestions, but they're relevant enough 2 mommy's thread here that I decided 2 just post a reply here. Sorry, mommy, if that's not the case.

"Hello, i'm a man and I have one question... how can you be married to a man you don't trust? If you are wondering where he has been on the internet or in e-mail... just ask him... again.. If you don't trust him he might not trust you."

Trust is something that must be EARNED. It can also be given as a gift, but only with the recognition of the possibility that it will be misused. All 2 often, when you say "I trust you", it's seen as an oppor2nity 2 take advantage of your naievte by some. And, if mommy simply asks her H if he's doing something inappropriate, what do you think his perception of the "easiest" or "safest" answer will be?

"I'm not trying to be a smarty pants, but... my wife cheated on me and we are now divorced..."

What did you do about it when you found out? Just divorce? Also, you said on your other 2 threads that you have been married 2wice. Which W cheated on you? Or did both of them cheat? What did you LEARN from your previous Ms. What did your xWs learn? What has your current GF learned? Are you really ready for a THIRD M?

"My other question is... how long do you except the idea of having to check up on him?"

mommy should do whatever she feels she needs 2 do 2 get information that will allay her suspiscions. Once she knows what's going on, she can probably stop "snooping."

-ol' 2long

I have to agree with snow, BB and 2long in that you have to do what you have to do. It would have to be a rare situation for the WS to confess to the A simply from being asked.

I used eblaster.

Thank you everyone who posted to this thread. Sorry to see its gone off on a tangent, so I'm not going to bother with responding to the non-issue.

I got a Computer Spying system. Spent $50 on it. I had NUMEROUS troubles with it. But I had a wonderful tech who helped me along. Then after it was all said and done and working....Well, come to find out it was all over the computer. Folders you couldn't change the name. "Computer Spying Software" everywhere. It was even in the control panel under add/remove programs COMPUTER SPYING SOFTWARE. My husband often browses the computer files and routinely checks the add/remove programs options. So unfortunately this particular program was just not right for me. I wish I had had enough patience to wait for a response here. So I ended up deleting/uninstalling the entire program and wasted $50. I wrote the company asking for a refund, but how likely is that? So anyways....that was my fiasco with my spy program. I hope to post another thread describing my situation soon....

Tricia

Tricia:

Sorry 2 hear you had such a hard time.

Have you read the articles on the home page? Maybe with a little insight in2 the way infidelity works (if that's what you're dealing with), you'll be better able 2 look for the telltale signs in your H's behavior.

I hope that isn't what you're faced with, but even if it is, it IS survivable.

best,
-ol' 2long

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by 2long:
<strong> Tricia:

Have you read the articles on the home page? best,
-ol' 2long </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I haven't had a chance to do so. I'll have to check them out. Thank you! I just posted my story on another thread. I'll need to set aside a good chunk of time to explore this website fully. My concentration right now is way off though right now. Can't focus on anything except what's right in front of me....

Tricia