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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28 |
My husband is living with another woman! We split because he was unhappy in our marriage and I thought he was having an affair. We split and the next night she was in my bed. Now they live together. I am still married to him and still love him. I have been talking to him and going to lunch with him behind her back. I have come closer to god since our split. I pray to be the best person I can be everyday. I have worked on being a better person and he has been going to counciling. If we got back together it would be a stronger, better relationship, but I don't know how to convince my husband of that or if I even should. In my heart I am half of a whole. A part of me is missing. My husband doesn't want to divorce me or let me go, but won't come home either. I need your input and prayers.
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 28 |
tawny,
I will keep you in my prayers. I am glad that you feel your relationship is stronger with both your husband and God. Keep praying because God can change him. Prayers are answered. Your husband can't have it both ways.
Molly
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28 |
Thank you. I just keep trying but its so hard. I miss him alot, but I feel god keeps pushing me in this direction. Thank you for your prayers.
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 28 |
tawny,
I you feel that his is right in your heart then it is. No, it is never easy and the pain is almost unbearable. I have been there done that. My husband had a physical affair with a woman in our community. If this helps, we have been to marriage couciling and graduated from there. We are doing great and I love him more now than the day I married him 20 years ago. When he first told me I knew also in my heart what the right thing to do was. I never swayed from that. I have never been sorry. I feel like it was God telling me what to do. God gives us circumstances to learn from and to bring us closer to Him.
Molly
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 781
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 781 |
Tawny,
Welcome! I'm sorry that you are in so much pain.
You'll get a lot of good advice from people here. I'm still relatively early in the recovery period. But...here's my two cents.
It seems to me that you are going to have to get tough if you want to save your marriage. Why is your husband keeping two women hanging on? Because he CAN.
Change that. Read up on plan A and Plan B and then implement them. Make it clear to yoru husband that you expect this affair to end NOW if he wants to save the marriage...and then be prepared toback that up with some tough love.
Make him see clearly that you aren't prepared to be a second choice. If his marriage is important to him, he better start to act like it.
Do you have kids, by the way?
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 28 |
No, no children. Just us.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
Tawny - Read all about Plan A on the link in my sig line. That is where you can start.
You might also want to jump over to general questions, as there is more traffic there.
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