My fiance confessed that he had been recently cheating on me, unprotected, while I was pregnant. He doesn't remember exactly how many, but it was with at least 20 girls. He could only call the name of five. Only one of those five could he give the first and last name of. He still wants to hang out late with his friends, sometimes overnight yet he gets upset when I check his cell phone. His "be right back" takes at least 2 hours when it should only take 30 min. We are a young couple(22 and 23) and have two children together. We are supposed to get married next year but I can't get past this and he's becoming irritated with me! I don't know how to deal with this.

Yikes - Not even married yet, and already he was with 20 women? Save yourself some trouble later, and unload him. He has been taking huge chances with your health and that of your unborn child.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by youthfuldaze:
<strong> We are supposed to get married next year but I can't get past this and he's becoming irritated with me! I don't know how to deal with this. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Let him be irritated. He sounds very immature for a father of three. He also sounds like a serious serial cheater and is likely to continue this behavior after you are married. Can you live with that?

What brought him to confess?

~ Snow

I would if I could but I can't. I think about my kids and my being alone. We've been together for 10 years(yes middle school) and I can't stand the thought of being without him or someone else being with him. Yet I'm having internal fits everytime his cell phone rings and he leaves. I hate not knowing who's on the other end of that call. I want to fix this mess so much but I'm driving myself crazy.

He called me one night at apx 4am and said he just couldn't keep it from me any longer. That was months ago. BTW we only have 2 kids.

What makes this so fresh to me is that we are not recovering. "Drop it", Leave it alone", " Will you let it go". Since then it's like he told me so he feels like he's done his part.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> we are not recovering. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">And sadly you won't recover as long as he refuses to see that there's a problem.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I'm having internal fits everytime his cell phone rings and he leaves. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You're young. Do you want live with this horrid feeling for the next 50+years? What will that do to you? What will that do to your children's mother? What will having him as a role model do to your little children?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">"Drop it", Leave it alone", " Will you let it go". </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If he doesn't get serious professional help, honey, I would "drop HIM", "leave HIM alone", "let HIM go."

I'm sorry I can't be more positive about your impending marriage. It's time to look at this man and this marriage without the rose-tinted glasses on.

Good luck, YD.

Nat

I really love my fiance and I don't want to give up. I will admit that when ever I mention this whole ordeal it's because I'm already mad about something or I'm in an ill mood. The other day I saw the one female that he named out in a store. There she was pushing a baby in a shopping cart and I could have died. " That *****", I thought, "that might be his baby". I would swear the store started to spin. So naturally when he got home I started. I simply mentioned, but he was too tired to talk and now he was mad that I had started talking "stupid". I can't even imply that I'm upset about it without him getting offended and defensive. He may remind me of how I have kissed two other guys & dated another guy (for 2 weeks) back in high school and how that had hurt him. If I'm wrong please let me know but I feel like that was years ago when I was very immature and can't be compared to the extremity of what he did. I feel immature by just bringing that up. I just want us to be able to work past this together, not just because I'm ticked at the moment, but because I want us to be okay again.