<BR>Guess what??? I saw the OW with a man today who was not my husband. My H is out of town working. He left this morning at 3 am and this evening at about 7pm she was with someone else!!!! Do I tell him?? Or do I let him find out for himself??? Will he be mad because I'm the one who saw her??? HELP!!!

SO THE BETRAYER IS BEING BETRAYED!!<P>WOW!! I would have just loved to be there with you when you saw her. How did you feel? I probably would have laughed up a storm. Knowing me, I would tell my husband, no matter his reaction was, but do it with tact. Sorry I can't help more, but I know I'd tell him. Don't know exactly how, but I would. Let us know what happens. Your in my prayers and thoughts.<P>------------------<BR>"If you can learn from the mistakes of others, you won't have to make them youself."<P>

If your H is like mine, there is no way he would believe YOU. He would actually have to see it for himself. My H is interested in a woman (married) who has had at least 6 men that I know of. But does he believe this? NO way. He thinks they are just rumors about his PRINCESS. Someway, Someday they will find out for themselves, and hope you will be there to enjoy it!

I felt the happiest I have felt in 5 days. He left me 5 days ago for her and I tried to tell him and he wouldn't listen. Serves him right. Now I'm mad as hell that he left and went to someone like her. I guess it's better than feeling sorry for myself. I feel like I have won part of the battle!!!!

Do you know this man was a date? Could it have been father/bro or coworker? Where they doing something date like or just out and about? Did she see you?<P>You will not help your case if you blow the whistle and it was a false alarm.<P>------------------<BR>Faith, Hope, Love Remain,<BR>but the greatest of these is Love.<BR>1 Corinthians 13:13

It was definately date-like. Probably just someone to sleep with. That's the type of person she is. They were all over each other. I don't know if she saw me or not. She knows my car but I didn't draw attention to myself because I had my children with me. I've thought it over and I'm still undecided as whether to tell or not. I'm busting though. I would love to. But I don't want to be the one who gets blamed.

I think some of the other are right, he may not believe you.<P>But...<P>Telling him at least gets the thought in his head, may make him wake up some<P>I did, saw the OM with another woman, just mentioned in a matter of fact way. She did'nt believe me but it made her suspicious of him (too bad )<P>If you think it wil have the desired affect do it<P>Jason<p>[This message has been edited by unseen2 (edited December 27, 1999).]

OK...if you are going to tell him, be careful to hide your glee.<P>Just as unseen2 said, be matter of fact. Maybe even a little sympathy for your H if you can muster it.<P>Maybe start that you saw her and you just hate to tell him...etc...<P>------------------<BR>Faith, Hope, Love Remain,<BR>but the greatest of these is Love.<BR>1 Corinthians 13:13

Now THAT is definately a KODAK moment!!! I would tell my husband, and I agree with the others, tell him tactfully, and try not to smirk in the process!<P>God bless,<BR>LilHick

When other woman had me arrested for calling her. (nice person huh) I was driving around one day and I stopped at a pay phone to call my friend. All of a sudden up drives OW and she gets out of her car and kisses this man. I wondered all along if it was her husband. He looked to be spanish or mexican? Her husbands name is Jesse, so I wasn't sure. Well found out about two weeks ago that it wasn't her H. I had to go to court over the phone call and her H was there to support her. I thought I was going to bust out laughing. Not only is she cheating on her devouted H, but also on mine. Of course I think it serves him right. He told me she was one of the most honest, caring and nice woman he has ever known. Wonder if her H feels that way? I never told my H. He would have just denied it and said I was making it up. No biggy, gave me laughing material and brightened my day 100%.<BR>Nancy

I talked to some friends and family members and they all think I should let him find out on his own. I think I'll drop a few hints though. Just enough to make me feel good and get him thinking. <BR>I hate to say it, but he needs to feel as bad as I do. <BR>Thanks for all the input and prayers. It's really boosted my self esteem and made me alot surer of myself.<BR>You guys are wonderful!!!

I would tell him. If he doesn't believe you what have you lost? I truly think you would feel better and I imagine you could use a little 'feeling better' right now huh?

Hi Guys! I talked to H last night and he was is a pi@@y mood. I ended up hanging up on him. He was being so nasty. he's out of town working and called me from work to see if I was still mad at him. Of course I was but I was civil about it. And then.....I told him! He didn't get mad at me. He actually listened. Asked details about it. So if I didn't gain anything else, at least I got him thinking. I told him that I was concerned for his health (AIDS, etc..). And it was basically a pleasant conversation. Who knows, maybe it was a small step.

I'm happy you found a way to tell him. And I'm so happy it turned out the way it did. Who knows what will happen from here, but continue to hang in there, you seem to be holding it together well. And remember we are here for you regardless!<P>------------------<BR>"If you can learn from the mistakes of others, you won't have to make them youself."<P>

Who knows what will happen. The last few minutes have been tough. I don't know why. I just miss him. I'm lonely, too. I miss my old husband, not the man he's being now. Evenings and nights seem to be the hardest. I can't even sleep in "our" bed. I've been sleeping on the couch. He still has alot of stuff here and whenever I see something of his, I have to fight to hold it together. I fully intend to Plan A him to death this weekend when he comes to see the kids. I just hope I can stick to while he's here, and not lose it when he goes to leave.

An good way to get the information passed to your spouse without looking like the bad guy is something like this, "John, in spite of our current situation, I feel it's only fair to warn you so you will not be humiliated when you find out later that Mary was with another man tonight. Maybe it was her brother or her dad..."

I told him in a very kind way. I told him he deserved better than that.(Even though I had to bite my tongue) I don't want the father of my children to end up with a disease like AIDS because of carelessness.