True, just checked and don't see the email. Wanna try to resend?

Rocked,
HA HA HA HA <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Holiday, I used to live in Utah, and went ot Vegas a couple of times! It was neat as a visitor, anyway. I have a friend there now who says he can't do anything b/c it's so expensive. Hope you get to "enjoy" it sometimes!

Rocked, I gotta go, but if you still haven't goten it later today, let me know, and I will try to remember all the great wisdom that I wrote before <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Okay, True, but haven't recv'd it yet. Have an awesome "forward-thinking" day!!!

Hmmmm, Rocked, you job is computer related...how's that? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ? I sell on ebay.

True-Utah huh? Yes, expensive here. We moved from a great little town in AZ called Prescott. We go to the movies and dinner occasionally. Pretty much home bodies. We like to travel with our Firemen friends on the Harley's.

Well off to eat lunch...

Holiday, I use a computer for my job but I'm not in the computer business. STRIKE ONE! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Logging off possibly for the rest of the day.

2, Keep taking back whatever the enemy has stolen. Especially your JOY!

DM, hurry up and get over your female problems. I got no time for that. (Gotta give a male comment! ha)

True, I'll be looking for that mystery email lost in cyberspace.

Holiday, Harleys? I'm thinking of buying a friend's Yamaha. Big enough for my wife and I to ride and do something new and wild. Will you still speak to me? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

As always I am praying for you all as you deal, heal and squeal. Don't forget...God's grace is SUFFICIENT! That means we can and WILL make it through all our CRAP!

Over, but never OUT!

Hey everyone. Counseling went great on one hand, not so great on another. She is preparing me for the possibility of more BOMBS being dropped. She agrees with my insight that this may not be my H first affair. So she suggest that I put it out there for him tomorrow at counseling. Come clean about EVERYTHING (I can't take anymore bombs...really) because if I find out more (like the conversation he had with OW weeks ago) then I will be ready to walk out. Tomorrow is due of die day for him. I'm scared, but prepared.

Please pray for me.

Holiday - I LOVE Vegas, you are in Henderson correct? We have some friends there and we go to Vegas often. Now the place of doom for me as he took OW there twice. Would love to meet you when I'm in town. Last trip (right before Christmas) stayed at Hard Rock and ate at Nobus. To die for! Fabulous food! Normally we stay at Venetian. I love that place.

True - feeling your pain...chickens?! Ugh! Look on the bright side, you can be a real Martha Stewart now. I love her. Free Martha!

Rocked I say you are a head hunter - executive recruiter. Just a random guess because I used to be one and I know a lot of people who did this kind of work did it from home.

Dog - feeling your female problems!

Guys, I'm ready for the BOMB, but so scared. My counselor believes my husband either has a sexual addiction or has a tendency toward it. If he doesn't treat it as an addiction, she believes this will not be the last affair. There are A LOT of issues my husband has that I can't really get into here (not really relevant either...this is for us.) and so I am beginning to suspect the worst. Mainly, for me his affair with OW was just too easy. He jumped in with both feet. I just think there were others.

Anyway, I will be around today.

Hi 2,

This is my H second affair that I know about. I really haven't asked him (pressured him) any further on the subject at this time. One or two, at this point it all feels like one "big" one to me. Do you still have that Myth book?? I think you might want to read read the chapter on Sexual Healing. I read the majority of this chapter to my H earlier today (daughter came home from school, so we will continue later tonight with more reading). He says it makes alot of sense to him of things he didn't know where these feelings were coming from. I thought too that he might be sexually addicted, but I think it's more an "entitlement", "variety" issue.

My son likes the Hard Rock and the Venitian is gorgeous. I prefer off the strip activities, truthfully. Perhaps if you should visit here and we get together, meeting me would change your mind as Vegas being a place of doom. This is still your town...take it back!

Rock, hmmm, perhaps your an analyst of some kind. Especially because you are with us here, helping us. I hope not strike two as a steak dinner is a great incentive.

I will look for you all later. Off to the mall with my daughter.

Hmmm...Recruiter? Analyst? Getting closer but not close enough for that juicy steak on the Vegas strip! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

True, no email. Plz resend.

Holiday, ever been to Central Christian Church in Henderson? I knew someone who went there.

2, Addiction def could be part of your H's problem and if so needs more help than just personally "wanting" to stop.

DM, is your "visitor" gone yet? (Code word my 13yr old daughter uses when she is on her girl-thing).

Will be checking in and out 2day. Was reading in Ephesians chapter 2 and 3 this morning with my wife. Noticed how often it talks of God's "power" available to us. Question: Have we been asking and tapping into God's power to deal and heal, or are we trying too hard on our own strength? Just a thought. Feedback??

Good morning guys. My husband and I had a LONG talk last night in anticipation for tonight counseling. I don't think there were other sexual relationships, but I do think that there were 2 other woman who he classified as "friends" that I and the counselor will classify as Emotional Affairs.

It is clear to me that my husband has been using other woman to lift him up when I failed him. Believe me when I tell you that I have been the most loving and supportive wife that I knew how to be. I honestly cannot look back and say "Oh here is where I failed". I think his void is too great for me to ever fill.

My husband has to give it to God, but FIRST he needs to admit everything to himself. He is still saying (and probably believing too) that the other girls where "just friends" and doesn't even realize how he used them to fill that void. He needs to realize it. And hopefully through counseling and my patience he will get to that place.

I find it NOT coincidental either that the OW came at a time when I COULD NOT provide sex...late in the pregnancy and right after delivery. He needed that void filled so bad (which he was able to fill some of with loving sex, not randam sex that too is relevant to his situation) that he turned to someone willing. I thank God that the OW was having sex with others while with my husband because I think when he finally gets all this he'll be able to see that he was the drug addict and she was the fix. Why else would he be involved with that type of a girl? Wasn't love! But wasn't only sex either. It couldn't be only sex for him. If it was, he would have went to prostitutes. She had to want him and like him for his ego and for the void to be filled correctly. He needed the fix and was willing to do anything to get it.

Anyway, my revelation. After our discussion Rocked, I read several chapters in Matthew, most of Jesus Parables. I know in my head that I can ONLY get through this with God's strength, so I am trying to lean on him. But even Jesus begged God to take away his situation and I find myself doing the same. "God Please just let me leave this marriage. This is all too painful." Like Jesus, I want to run, but I am going to be God's servant, do his will even if I don't like it. I need to pray for a heart like HIS so that I will carry my cross with a happy heart.

Rocked, I don't like steak. If I win can I do a great fish house?

2, yep, all the crab legs you can eat!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> But, you gotta guess correctly sister.

Have a lunch appt I'm late for. Good to hear from you. Sounds like your theory on your H is coming together. I had a mid-low yesterday but perked up this morning with my W (if ya get my drift!) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Control of the mind and what I allow it to focus on plays such a key in my countenance. Pray for my "forward-thinking".

Will email you later what I promised.

Hi, there turetoself. I read your story and found myself wanting to post to you and tell you my story.
It has been about a month now! But I manage an apartment complex and have been for 3 years now. I became very good friends with a resident, she is 21 years old and I am 30. I have 2 girls (10 & 8) and I have been with my husband for 13 years. I still don’t understand why I became friends with someone who is 10 years younger than me and we really have nothing in common. She is your typical 21 year old, went to Las Vegas for her 21 b-day and had a 1 night stand, goes out every weekend looking for (boys as she calls it). So anyway she’s my friend right and I let her into my life and my children’s life. Well the end of November my mother that lives in California got into a car accident and I had to be on a plain the next day to go help my parents (I am an only child). While I was gone I talked to my husband and my friend daily to see if my kids were ok ect. I think looking back now there was only 1 night when I was a bit jealous that my friend was helping care for my kids and with my husband. I called 1 night and she was over playing a game with my kids she had brought over pizza and rented a movie and was doing a lot for them and I told my husband that I was upset. But he just told me that there’s nothing to be upset about and nothing to worry and I didn’t. When I came home from California I new right when I got off that plane and saw my husband something was different. We started having problems right away. He was telling me that he needed his space and that I don’t give him enough space. He even talked about sleeping in our daughter’s room or me talking to my work and seeing if they would let him get a 1 bedroom apartment. It was driving me crazy because he DID NOT have an answer WHY our marriage was going this way. Dumb me called my friend and told her all about it and she even tried to help by talking to him. But @ the end of the day NOBODY could tell me WHY my husband all of a sudden needed space. It took me 5 days to figure it out!! I started accusing him of having an A with my friend and he denied it. I didn’t even tell her BUT he did and she did everything she could to try and convince me that there was NOTHING going on. SO I did finally find out and YES he had and A with my SO CALLED FRIEND. I called her immediately and thanked her for betraying my friendship, she played dumb with me but when I told her that she wasn’t sure that she F**ked my husband 4 times while I was in California she plainly said to me I DON’T KNOW and then hung up. I went home and what a surprise that she was trying to call my husband. Still trying to deny that anything happened. He finally told her she knows and then she blamed my husband for coming on to her. SO like I said it has been a month and I find myself emotional, angry, loving, you name it. I have visions of them having sex, I think about what he said to her, what he wore, how he touched her. Then there are days that I am fine and I think about it but it doesn’t get me down and I know he loves me and is going to be with me. Like your husband I was my husbands first and the way your husband feels about not being with any other woman is exactly they way my husband feels. They way you feel about being proud about being his only is the way I feel as well. I have been with other people before I met my husband. I really cherished the fax that He had only been with me. Now I have to live that he has been with someone else and he did it while we were married. He broke our wedding vows like they were a joke to him @ them time. I only wonder if she would have said to him you know your are married? And he replied back SO! or Oh my marriage stinks so it’s OK. So anyway turetoself I would love to hear what you think on my story. Hang in there with your situation!

Hi SJS and welcome!

I am new to this little group too and they are all wonderful. I am sorry for all the pain you are feeling right now.

I hope I can give you good guidance as I am sure the others will try to too.

Having the truth out there is the first step towards recovery.

My H's second affair has brought me to this place. And I thank God every day for the friends here.

2-I feel your H did not choose a prositute because (ironic here) that would be an "un Christian" choice. He chose someone he was a "friend" with.

Like Rocked put it, I feel my H may have needed to feel that he was wanted sexually. When you pay someone for their favors, it lacks the effect. I think that maybe having conversations with a "potential" partner is more fulfilling/fills the void. It may not always lead to sex, but the attraction feelings are deepened. The chase is exciting and keeps one interested for a lengthier time via conversation. Just my take on it.

Rocked-How about a telemarketer? Don't tell me strike three...Girl's rule: I get 3 strikes, but on the 2nd, I can have fouls...ha!

Holiday, Telemarketer? That wasn't even a foul ball. You're so far off I'd say you're still in the dugout! ha.

I'm back now from being out of the house. (That's a hint that my job does take me away from my pc.) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Welcome SJS. You'll find this group is very open, honest, and truly cares for each other. Oh yeah, we like to have fun and laugh too. We all agree that life SUCKS sometimes (especially now in our marriages) but life does continue and none of us want to lose our joy completely.

In your situation, honesty on your H's part, and yours, is priority #1.

Hey Guys! Miss you all today. Still anixous about my session tonight.

Just talked to a friend who revealed some not so good news about her husband to me. She found e-mails from someone who her husband shouldn't be talking to...an ex. She said she felt bad snooping. I didn't want to tell her that he's cheating, because I don't know if he is. But I told her to check out this website. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Anyway, Rocked how about outside sales? Maybe pharmacuticals (sp?) No crab either. I only like fish.

Holiday no doubt the need to feel attractive is the driving force here, so prostitutes wouldn't work. But why that need? I don't care who thinks I'm attractive as long as he does. So why would he care if some random chick thought he was hot? Who cares? That is what he needs to get to the bottom of.

Talk to you guys later!

2, Nope. Not into drugs. I hope your session tonight goes well. Speak the truth in love. Have an open heart to what God may want to say to you. Learn from the past BUT move on and build the future.

YOU GO GIRL! TAKE IT BACK! TAKE IT ALL BACK!!!

Ephesians 3:20-21

Rocked... you need to be honest with us all here and tell us what you do!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Be open and honest with all of us here- RIGHT?? My guess is a Pimp! he he he.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I crack me up- come on... did anyone else laugh?????

How is everyone? I see we have a new "face" here in the pack. I feel so much for you- there you were being so good to your mother and your husband is off having fun with some slut!! I would get all the tests available for STD's... if she has one night stands... that would make me worry. Was your husband safe? Oh I feel so bad for you dear... so so so bad. I know you were looking for answers from True- but please know we all have been betrayed here and in some way maybe we all can give you a shoulder. Does your H want to work on your marriage?