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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2 |
We have been married for 5 years and living apart for the last 6 months. He was posted to a new job overseas. Original intention was for me to join him there later, but there's been no mention of it for the last few months.
Just found out that my husband is having an affair. Think it started about 3 months back. Confronted him but he denied it. Not sure the extent of the affair. He then brought up the issue of divorce saying that feelings were long gone.
He's now gone back to his job, and left me all alone here. He's also not responding to his family or my calls.
I would like to salvage the marriage but it looks hopeless as he's gone missing. I really do not know what i can do at this stage since he is evading from talks with me, and has refused to come back to face it. Any advise?
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,087
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Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,087 |
Hi XAV,
Welcome to Marriage Builders.
First off, is your H still providing for you? I mean do you still have the meanst to pay all of your bills and put food on the table? There may be some legal recourse if he's abandoned you... but someone else will have to advise you on that as I have no experience
The "I'm not in love with you"... "The feelings have gone..." is pretty standard stuff from a wayward spouse (WS).
Read up on the articles here on the MB web site... and give us a little be more background on your situation... Is your H in the military?
Semper Fi,
RIF
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 2 |
He's still providing for me financially as i'm not working. He's not in military but an engineer. No kids. He is 8 years older than me. He's into his 40's.
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,087
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Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,087 |
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by xav:
<strong> He's still providing for me financially as i'm not working. He's not in military but an engineer. No kids. He is 8 years older than me. He's into his 40's. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">That's good... at least you don't have to worry about finances right now. Has he given you any clues as to why he felt things had changed?
Read up on Plan A on the web site here and try to see what areas you can work on for yourself... You need to take care of yourself right now...
If you are sure that he's having an affair, could you notify the company that he works for? Many companies frown on A's especially if it's on the company's nickle....
Semper Fi,
RIF
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,514
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Member
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,514 |
Yes, those words are very typical to a man in the fog of an A. I have been hearing them all over again myself!
So sorry for the pain I know you are feeling. It must be very frustrating to not know where he is or what he is doing. That would drive me crazy!
Keep posting, there are great people on this site. (((hugs)))
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