I have posted twice before and I also know that not much has passed since D-Day(12-15-04) but I am just so unclear where this is leading me. My wife has cut off OM(so she says), but has relied on another OM as a friendship. She still gives nothing as intimacy. We have been going to MC(2 sessions only so far)but I see no progress, maybe even a step back.

I cant get over the snooping because every time I do I seem to uncover something new. My wife still denies PA but has admitted EA. I know she has continued EA with new OM. This OM is S and not dating as far as I know. We have 2D(10,2) and life at home is stressfull for everyone involved.

I am going to start Plan A this weekend but so far she seems reluctant to end relationship. She no longer tells me "she loves me" on the phone or otherwise. I have given all the EN's she has told me she wanted, but she is unwilling to accept them now.

I know she is not 100% happy with our MC but it will be difficult to start over, it seems to have taken forever to get to this point. How is trust bulit up again from BS? Will WS understand what she has done and doing to family? I want WS to speak honest truth about A, not details but full admission. Please offer guidance in difficult time for me.

Wecome to MB. I know I'm not the best qualified person to be responding. There are people on this site with several thousand posts and responses so keep posting and asking questions until you find what you need.

My wife has cut off OM(so she says), but has relied on another OM as a friendship .

How has this ended the EA?

We have been going to MC(2 sessions only so far)but I see no progress, maybe even a step back.

You probably will make no progress until she has no contact with the OM .

I am going to start Plan A this weekend but so far she seems reluctant to end relationship. She no longer tells me "she loves me" on the phone or otherwise. I have given all the EN's she has told me she wanted, but she is unwilling to accept them now.

Are these the EN's from the book His Needs/Her Needs? In the book it talks about knowing our S's 10 (there could be more) needs and really concentrating on meeting (being masters at meeting) the top 3. I know for myself I could never meet all the top 10.
The book is sold on this site or can be found locally.

Will WS understand what she has done and doing to family?

As long as the WS is "getting her fix" from the OM common sense for your relationship will make no sense. If EA keeps going she will be almost like an alien to you.

Plan A is about meeting her needs, no lovebusters,(angery ouotbursts/disrespectful judgements/demands)and respectfully getting her to agree to NC with the OM.

Please do a lot of reading on this site. There is a ton of information about PLan A/B.
Surviving An Affair may also be a good book to read. When we know the causes, the "anatomy" and the directions an affair can go it also helps.

Posting on the General Questions 2 section also may help since it seems to the most traveled on this site.

Good luck and sorry your here. If your WS is telling the truth (about EA) you may have a chance to implement a Plan A and save all involved from a lot of hurt.

Wish you the best

Jerry

mywifeisbeautiful,

Are you still with us? If so,I have a lot to mention and you could come over to GQII.Let us know if you're here.It's been a while since you posted.

O