Hi, <BR>In Plan A-ish as sugg by S.and Dr. Harley.<P>Affair one year old; minimal contact due to TWO fogs-<BR>alcohol and affair.<P>Harley's told me to do a Plan - A - ish letter: tell H taht I am making positive changes to self no matter what happens. Sent 3/7/01. patience and wait. No LB's .<P>Has dumped a lot on me but still love H and can see past all this to being a family again.<P>Would I be wise to present myself-even if it be brief- if H comes to see our children? A visual for him... plant a seed to remember that I can be kind and civil in light of the conditions of infidelity and financial devasatation--easier said than done? Yes, but I will give it my best shot--for my family and reconciliation.<P>No pressure, just hello and how are you. good to see you.<P>elo<P>He did call and asked son how is Mom? Yet he doesn't ask to talk me or see me? So hard to take? I will wait patiently and try my best not bust love.<P>Any advice. Harleys said may 3-6 weeks in A and then to B.<BR>We will see. Have kids; will see what I do. <P>Talk to me, please.<P>elo

Hi Liz,<P>About a month before you go to it...<BR>...draft that Plan B letter...<P>Check out my posts...<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000177.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan B - 101 (2nd ed.)</A><BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000413.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan B - 201</A><BR>...before you do.<P> <P>Jim