Ok hello all. Just an update and a word to all BS's currently knee deep in Plan A. Keep it up, don't quit. It can work, I'm living, walking proof. BRIEFLY....W has EA that went PA....lasted 3+ months...W ended it...confessed 30 days later....got pregnant by OM....abortion. <P>Here I am 5 weeks past d-day and I have to say that I was fortunate to find this site just 2 days after d-day and have implimented its principles immediately. Of course at first I LBed like crazy. It actually took a LB session to scare the hell outta me. After things were going so good, I up and out of the blue LBed which actually caused her to think twice about staying and trying to work it out. We both agreed to abide by the rules of Plan A and I broke them several times. She cried, we hugged and I quickly apologized realizing my screw up. I haven't LB'd since, that was over 3 weeks ago.<P>We've identified some ENs I wasn't meeting and I started working on those right away with tremendous response. All I was doing was simply doing what I should have done long ago. Our relationship is going places, fast and both of us couldn't be happier.<P>She up and out of the blue told me yesterday that she was "feeling much better about us". I was at work and I cryed right there at my desk. W is affectionate, attentive and just plain fun to be around. I could not have done any of this if it were'nt for this site, much koodos <P>And to all of you BS and WS, your help and input is the best. I will still keep coming here to post and help if I can. It's too soon to call us recovered, but we are well on our way. Plan A can and does work, stick to it. Don't LB and identify all ENs and meet them.<P>Keeping a stiff upper lip<BR>SP

<BR>And to all of you BS and WS, your help and input is the best. I will still keep coming here to post and help if I can. It's too soon to call us recovered, but we are well on our way. Plan A can and does work, stick to it. Don't LB and identify all ENs and meet them.<P>Keeping a stiff upper lip<BR>SP[/B][/QUOTE]<P>LOL! I just had to respond, SP! I love your screenname-- That is so clever and funny, to boot! <P>I've been reading and posting on the MB for only about a month or so, but am thanking GOD every day for finding this great site. The information on it is literally saving my marriage and what's funny is that I read the info on it in no particular order, so I really wound up missing a lot. If I may, I'd like to advise newcomers to please take the time to read ALL of Dr. Harley's articles on this site and please do them in the order he suggests. Otherwise, you'll wind up with only bits and pieces of really good knowledge and end up spinning wheels.<P>Plan A really DOES work! I'm into it for only about a week and it's unreal how much closer my H (who is the WS in our case who had an EA) is to me now. I even like my own self a bit better now as I am much calmer, and just plain more likable. I mean, who needs a spouse who is yeliing, pouting, screaming or crying, even though she has every right to be doing those things! Never in all my life have I known such pain, and I've been through no less than 18 really bad surgeries over the past 6 years. Believe me, the pain I felt from being betrayed was far worse than any physical pain I went through. <P>Well, things are not 100% for us yet, either, SP. But, at least we are worlds ahead of where we both were just a scant 6 weeks ago. Thanks to Dr. Harley and the wonderful folks who post on this board, that is!<P>Hugs and wishing everyone peace on this fine day..<BR>Winny<P>