Have been play Aing on my own since Jan. Nothing, no response, says cannot imagine no communication with OW.<BR>But I conitnued til about 3 weeks ago.<P>H was out of town for his job and was emailing back and forth friendly how are yous, those type of things. And in response to one of those (I think after he talked to OW) he said that the upcoming move would be time for us to seperate and go our different ways. He is military and has an assignment coming in August, he will go there and I will go home. Says that he does these things through the e mail as he doesn't like to see the pain in my eyes when he talks to me. Dah!!! So upon his arrival home, I got COLD towards him, no more goodbye kisses, (he did try 4 times or so, I just turned away), usually haave coffee together every night, he asks and I say no thank you! I can tell that in the beginning that this bothered him, not sure anymore.<P>He had not told our 3 kids about any of this til Wednesday night, the 16 yo had made the comment to me earlier in the week that she had 2 more years to go and do things with the family and I said probably not, she said what's up and I said you will have to ask your dad, so Wednesday night she did, and he told her, without me preset. Pissed me off, I just happened to hear them talking and walked into the room, asked afterwards when he planned on telling me that he had talked to her says he didn't know. Stayed up together for the 19 year old to come home and told him together, H said to both that there was a OW and that he wanted to be with her and be happy as he didn't love me anymore but still loved them. Asked if he felt relief afterwards and said that he did. Still hasn't told the 10 year old, the baby. He will have to leave Sun again so will have to tell her tonight. (not looking forward to that) The other two said they knew something was up, and that this would be for the best for all of us, shocked me that they thought that breaking up their family was ok. (things have never been bad between H and me, definately not loud)<P>I did send a letter to OW not a mean or nasty letter, definately not threatening, just asked her to leave H alone for a whileand if he coninuted calling to just say he needed to resolve his marriage problems first. Also asked that she acknowledge that she received letter either e mail, snail mail, or collect call. Been over a week since sent, nothing. H hasn't brought it up either, should I drop it or call her or ask him about it?<P>My questions is this... Do I go back to a plan A limited?<BR>or full fledge plan A? or stay North?<P>And I don't want to hear do what feels right for you! LOL! I know that!! Have been on MB long enough for that! Want to hear what you would do in like circumstances or suggestions.<BR>I know that this is his problem not mine, and that I cannot change his mind, but what if he were to have just a few doubts? Don't want to do anything yet that closes that door or window that the Lord has left open. We are still living as roomates in same house with kids, and do somethings as a FU (family unit) and others take turns with the kids, usually spend at least 1 hour a day in each others company.<BR>He does admit that he appreciates the way that I have handled all of this so far, others have said the same thing, and that he is very lucky that I haven't blown up or had a cow!! That makes me feel good!<P>So will check back later tonight from work and hopefully there may be a few suggestions for me. C ya daybreak
