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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 9
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 9 |
Ok.. my husband and I have been separated for 9 weeks. He says he does not love me and blah, blah, blah same old stuff everyone else has heard. I wrote a letter to him on Monday and gave him a present for his b-day (which is the 14th) The present was from our 6 week old baby. Anyway.. in the letter I explained the whole "love bank" concept and told him we just needed to do things to fill that love bank back up, so when he comes to visit our daughter maybe we could go have lunch or start meeting other places other than my mother's house which is where we are staying. No one is even living at our house, he refuses to stay there. Anyway.. I emailed him and asked him to go to a concert at our church Tuesday night, and he wrote back and said "thanks for asking, but I am not going to that." ok - here is my question:::: should I ask him if he would like to go to lunch on Sat. for his b-day with me and the baby? He does not want to even work on the marriage, but I see VERY FEW signs of maybe, possibly the fog lifting-- like him going to our house and changing the A/C filter (which is something he didn't even do while we were married) and looking through our photo albums. Anyway should i invite him to lunch or not?????
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 2,909
Member
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Member
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 2,909 |
ashleybelle--<BR>Yes, I believe in putting opportunities to be together in your path...just do not be (or act) too disappointed should he say no...<P>It is very hard not to be 'desperate,' but the harder we chase, the faster they run....you have to find a way for him to come to you....<P>Cali
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 9
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 9 |
Thanks Cali, I just emailed him, and I am waiting for a reply. I will keep my fingers crossed!<BR>ashley<BR>
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
Member
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Member
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060 |
ditto Cali<P>One more thing. If you ask and he declines - especially if it's done face-to-face or over the phone - don't fall into the trap of asking "Why not?". Just respond to a declination in a casual, no-big-deal way, "Ok, maybe next Sunday."<P>WAT
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 266
Member
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Member
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 266 |
ashleybelle:<P>ditto the others... My W turned me down last week to do something with me for my birthday... It turned into a big LB... I too am still tempted to ask her to things with me, but she has just consistently turned me down... Says it's not a good idea... We are about to get separated, and I am trying to decide if we should set some kind of standing lunch date every two weeks just to keep in touch... Excuse me, I meant to say "ask" if we can set that up...<P>hang in there,<BR>zen
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