Haven't posted in a couple of days. H came over Wed. night and we had a great night. Thursday came and before bed H told me that he had broken up w/OW and that he did not think he could live without her. That he had to get her back before all was lost with her. All with her? He left the next day and took with him MB stuff I printed off. The next day our son awoke and was screaming again for him. Son kept asking for dad and I told him he was at apt. Son said no, daddy in disneyworld with that lady. My heart just broke. So I drove to his apt. to bring son over to see him. Had never done this before. When I came in there, immediately I saw on the fridge pics of our son, and in the middle a pic of H and Ow in a limosine together smiling. My heart again broke. Then I looked around his apt. and saw pics of her as a baby. Killed me. They weren't really photo quality, just printed off computer. I walked over and ripped them to shreds. Then one thing led to another and we had it out. It was horrible. H said I lost it and that he could never allow himself around me again. H pushed me down and I hurt my wrist. Had an anxiety attack so bad that I went to hospital on my way home. My bp was right up there again where it was when I almost died giving birth to ur son. After much bloodwork, iv's and getting me stable, I went home. H still said he would go see counselor. Today I received email saying that I needed to leave home before this weekend. That H was moving back in here and that he did not want to be alone with me ever again. That I bring out the worst in him and that he is going to move all our belongings to house back in hometown while I am gone. This is the week before Christmas and all is now lost. H said I needed to get on w/my life now and that what we are going through now is just a "transition". No, our marriage is not breaking apart, we are just in transition. Isn't that what they say when a new president moves into the white house? A transition team? That is all that it is to him. B is here and is now. I am going to attempt to re forward my B letter to him again soon. H says he is still going to see counselor to tell her his side of story. IMHO, why bother or waste more of our money? I don't quite see why. I am on the verge here people of just giving him for Christmas what he wants--the big D. Please pray forme. All is now lost. It's over. I am in tears and am shaking all over again. It's worse than the last d day. I can now say that I believe that he is not at all a Christian and was probably just pretending all these years. How can a father, a husband do this? It happens. We see it happen here. We try to deal with this kind of stuff, but sometimes Satan is strong. I am strong in faith, but now am just wiped out. Please pray and pray for us tonight. Old buds, please come to mee online in this dark hour. Orchid, I'll call you later. These last two days have almost been to hard to even speak. God bless you friends. I fear that soon I'll have to move to the D column. I pray not, but what's my alternative after B?

I am sad to hear things are so hard for you now. Give your H some space, it may help to work things out. Plan b is a good idea. YOur desperation may be hurting you more than helping you. I know, I did it too.. be glad the OW was not there... they filed charges against me with the da.... can you believe it? I am so disguisted with this sicko behavior... but we have to take care of ourselves, ... do not let the holidays bring you down... take care of that little one... do not let your H start to say you are a bad MOM, he can do that to you. WATCH OUT>
with love, lisa

Hi Peach,<p>ohhh... hon, I am sorry you have been through soo much. I will wait for your call. I am still at work. <p>You have to be out of the house this weekend? If you are not ready then, let him know you will leave when you are ready. Don't let him bully you Peach. He wants you out, then he needs to meet your requirements. He can pay for a mover, pay whatever you need to meet your deadline. <p>I think he is being unreasonable because he is mad. If the OW is such a great thing, tell him to go get her before someone else does. Hm..... that's what I told my H and he started to go (this was a few months ago), then he stopped. See she wasn't this great catch just for some stupid reason they like making us feel bad. <p>Take that away from him Peach. I know I can't hurry up your feelings but retain your diginity and ladylike southern pride. In a good way of course. <p>Tell him if the OW is great then tell the world. Let the whole neighborhood know that this MM is dumping his family, throwing them out on the street. It's not that bad? Well, it could be. Him rushing you out could be like throwing you out on the street. <p>Ok, maybe it is not a good idea to let the entire world know. Be careful. But tell him if he thinks he is doing such a good thing let him go ahead and tell the neighbors and family..... Let him do the work Peach, not you. OK? <p>Don't ride this roller coaster with him. If he threatens you and hurts you to the point of anxiety attacks, whatever, share it with him. Let him know his part. If he is ok with doing that to you and it makes him happy (get his acknowledgement on that), then it will be easier for you to move on. It will hurt but his wickedly smiling face (the one all WS' have when they are up to no good and horribly selfish) will be what motivates you to move ahead. <p>If he should have a change of heart, then you decide. This a hard time Peach and your health and your son need to be your primary importance. <p>Take Care,
L.

Garbage,garbage. Nothing but that stuff from him. H emailed me and says he wants a war free divorce. That we can both go to mediators. Tells me what I am going to get, what is going to happen, etc. Threatens me that if I get a lawyer that ther will be blood. Threats the very week before Christmas. H is definitely on again w the monkey ho. I have changed my pass on computer and will immediately change anything else. I am so sick of this. H wants this D, now I will go into full B and give it to him. He says in email that he was fortunate to have met Ow. I have this in writing and also how he went to marriage conference with her. Great for proof huh? I am sick of this psyched out crap. He actually said to me that she wanted us to work out. My butt she did. If that were the case, she'd be sleeping with another married man now. What a monkey ho. I am sick sick sick of this. He can have her. I am not going to give in and told him I'd rather starve & live in a 1 bedroom apt. than have the rest of my life dictated to by a man who does not love me nor have regard for our past. That is the gospel truth. Forwarded all emails to counselor. Can't wait to hear what she says to him. She is a Christian counselor and her ex H did the same to her. She will go down hard on him after reading how he bullies me. In some wierd also psyched out way, H is making this so much easier for me. If I file before new year, I can have a date. I know that's not very spiritual of me right now, but hey, he will be going to Hawaii w/monkey ho now. I am sure of it. Orchid babe, I'll be on the phone with you in a bit. This is all too wild, too wierd stuff now. God bless you and pray for H. He is so lost. There is no helping him except for God.

Peach--What a bunch of crap! The fact that WS pushed you down makes my blood boil--don't put up with that--ever. <p>I have to say I would definitely tell the world, it'll probably make you feel better. Let the cat out of the bag.<p>In the meantime, as far away as it may seem, remember what coaching legend Jimmy Valvono said--"Dont ever, ever give up". The Lord works in mysterious ways. <p>Please try to have some fun with the kids as hard as it is. Do something physical--bowling, skating, arcade instead of sitting in a movie or a place where you could get upset.<p>I have prayed daily for you and all, and I want all of us to have at least ONE positive sign before X-Mas. <p>Keep your chin up, but don't let him be abusive. Make him take action on the house.<p>Keep the faith,<p>Guido

Peach, <p>I hope you are able to rest a bit tonight. I worry about your blood pressure. You know the signs, watch yourself. Don't get more worked up than you can handle ok? It is futile to tell you not to get upset but just cap it before it gets you. <p>I tried calling but got your answering machine. I will check on you in the morning. If you need to call.....I'm no doc but I will be available.<p>Hugz,
L.

peachy,
So sorry to hear this. You better protect yourself and let him go. Your health is the most important so that you could care for S. Hope you could reach Orchid. I have to go now and I will keep praying for you. My WW is strangely choose to stay home & come w/ us to 2 D practice even OM is not working today. It is LB to her for me to be here. I will check again tomorrow.

Hi GP,
Take care of yourself and don't let him tell you how this will be done - take a deep breath and sit down with your counselor and map out a plan - to divide things up - to discuss finances etc -- PROTECT YOURSELF and YOUR SON at this point -- I've been there - plese remember that when this hell is over - there is still life out there!!! You are obviously a very worthy and desirable woman and remember that - if he doesn't see your worth and value - you keep it and remember it - other's will. YOU DESERVE LOVE and YOU DESERVE TO BE SOMEONES NUMBER 1! You're in my prayers.

Hi There peach, I am so sorry. I was there a while back and now we are working on things, kind of anyway... maybe not... I don't even know... but it has gotten a little better. DO not lose all faith, but plan b sounds good for a while, let him see what he is losing... plan a is what I am in right now... I see how angry you are.<p>You will have to have a lwyr. - do not let him take advantage of you, no way. Do not let him threaten you... once you get an attoryney he can take his threat calls, not you. THis is crzy. My H was being just awful, and still thinks if we divorce it will be on his terms, NO NO NO><p>He is the adulterer... gather proof, etc... while you continue to take care of yourself, stay away from him for a while. enjoy the holidays with your precious one. take care, you are in my prayers, l

Peach,
I am so sorry to hear of what has happened between you and your husband. I'm sure you well know that my advice will be totally different than anyone elses's, but I hope you take heed.<p>I know you feel angry, hurt, confused, etc. it's normal. You feel rejected and betrayed-but the key word in all of this is FEELING! NEVER act on your feelings, you will do irreversible damage to your situation. Instead pray, fast, pray and pray some more! Please get "How God can and will restore your marriage" from restorem.org and began to apply biblical principles to your marriage. I don't agree with the Plan A/Plan B because it was a process designed by a MAN! Christian or not, you need to rely soley on God at this point. In Philipians 3:1, it says that if a husband is not obediant to the Word, he may be won without a word from his wife, but by the purity of her behavior" You should not initiate any communication with your husband via e-mail, letters, phone calls, or visits. <p>If he wants you out, OBEY your husband out of reverence to Christ. DO NOT obtain an attorney, and tell your husband that you already agree to his terms and that you will NOT contest the divorce. I guarantee you that if you fight your husband on this he will fight you back! Others will think that I am crazy and say you have to protect you and your son, but as long as God is for you NO ONE can be against you-not even your husband. God will provide all your needs once you put your trust totally in HIM!<p>Now is the time to devote your time and life totally to God, yourself, and your son. Also, you may want to reconsider your trust in a counselor who has been divorced-take your maker as your husband (Isiah 54:5) for now, and pray for your earthly husband everyday. <p>Get yourself together so that you can start working at least part-time to support you and your son. If at all possible, stay within a reasonable traveling distance, I have a feeling your husband will be coming around sooner than you think if you began to trust in God and let God work on your husband.

<p>[ January 20, 2002: Message edited by: Bunny ]</p>

Hi Peach.<p>How are you doing tonight? <p>L.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Orchid:
<strong>Hi Peach.<p>How are you doing tonight? <p>L.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>
L,
Did she answer your VM ?. It makes me worry.

RH, <p>I called her cell. She said she would get back to me later...... I will let you know later. <p>L.

GP????<p>Howz it goin hon? We haven't heard from you in a while and been a bit worried. <p>Please let us know how you are doing. <p>L.

Peachy,<p>Merry Christmas for you & your son, may new years bring us a new horizon. Keep us updated.<p>[ December 24, 2001: Message edited by: redhat ]</p>

Hi Peach,<p>It has been a while and I know you have been very very busy. Please update us when you can. We are all thinking about you and keeping you and your family in our prayers.<p>Hugz.
L.