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do I let her in on Plan A
#460426 12/22/01 09:28 AM
Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 32
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hopeto
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hopeto
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My story is much like everyone elses. I neglect W needs, W turns to someone else for support, OM happens to be seperated from his wife, etc. I have printed all of the basic concept material and am going to try and convince her to go through it with me over this Holiday. It would be helpful to me for her to fill out the EN questionnaire. But do I show her what is posted for "What is Plan A/Plan B" or for that matter anything in the "How to recover from Infidelity" section. Should I let her know what the plan is or do I simply carry it out? I am new to this, new to computers, new to asking anyones advice, excuse my inability to communicate well but I am taking it all on. I feel like I am in the fight of my life and any help is appreciated.<p>Jeff
Re: do I let her in on Plan A
#460427 12/22/01 11:15 AM
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 5,733
Northern California
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redhat Offline
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redhat
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Jeff,
Watch out, it might be an LB for her, don't push it. It is not to educate your W about MB, just do it once if she takes the bait you could continue otherwise stop it. This is the very reason a lot of us working w/ MB conselor.
Just do your plan A and no LB. You don't even tell her that you are doing it, let her observe your change(s). Look for the comments from her, unless she is willing participant. Even so you might want to get her to counsel too.
Re: do I let her in on Plan A
#460428 12/22/01 11:26 AM
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Posts: 32
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hopeto
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hopeto
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Thanks redhat I will take it under advisement. I will suggest it once and if she does not bite I will back off. I read what you wrote under the suggestions topic and other places your advice is always consistent. Love first. I will be gone for a few days so I will post if I need advice when I return. Thanks for the reply, god bless and Merry Christmas.<p>Jeff
Re: do I let her in on Plan A
#460429 12/24/01 11:29 AM
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 53
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Anxiously awaiting Offline
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Anxiously awaiting
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ditto to redhat;
It is so hard to back off but pushing your WS won't work. <p>I have been waiting for over a month for her to complete the EN questionnaire. Just no urgrency. Everyones responses were the same. They will complete the questionnaire when they want and we have to be patient with NO LB.<p>Good luck !
coping&hoping

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